Life hack of a smart girl: how to please his mother. Life hack of a smart girl: how to please his mother How to make a good impression on a guy's parents
So, you and your boyfriend have been dating long enough that he decided to introduce you to his parents. This is good! For guys, this is a very serious step, a new stage in a relationship. How to make his parents love you?
1. Be on time
If you are invited to a family dinner for 4:00, do not try to come at 4:30. It's better to show up a couple of minutes earlier than the appointed time.
2. Be ordinary
Do not try to impress with a flurry of information that you are a student - an excellent student, an activist, an athlete, a Komsomol member and just a beauty. Just if the conversation touches on studies, sports, hobbies, you can smile and say: “Yes, I like to study”, “Oh, I also like to run in the morning” or “Really? I also watch boxing all the time.” Your interests can be a pretext for subsequent invitations. For example, help your son with physics, watch Stars on Ice with the whole family, go on a picnic on the weekend. In general, do not focus the conversation on your interests, ask your boyfriend's parents about their hobbies.
3. Dress decently
No parent wants to see their precious son walk home hand in hand with a girl in a miniskirt, crop top and a provocative lower back tattoo. This, of course, does not mean that you urgently need to find a dress below the knee and with a collar under the throat, a hat and shoes of your grandmother. You can wear jeans, a skirt just above the knee, a dress, a not too bright T-shirt.
4. Watch your speech
Slang or swearing through the word will not help you please your boyfriend's parents. Do not try to tell what "cool disco" you were at last night. A “pretty” story about how you got drunk at prom with your girlfriends will also not go unnoticed. Tell something about your dog, just politely answer questions.
5. Remember good manners
It may sound trite, but your boyfriend's parents will love it if you offer to help set the table, clean up after dinner, even just say thank you politely. Do not chew with your mouth open, do not start eating until everyone has sat down at the table. By the way, you can take a small gift for dinner with you - sweets or cookies.
6. Most important
Remember this rule!!! Never, please, NEVER kiss or hug a guy in front of his parents. The maximum that you can afford is a quick kiss on the cheek at a meeting - nothing more! And when you come, not a single word addressed to the guy should hint about sex.
7. Be yourself
Well, yes, this is another platitude. But parents do not want to see a “doll” next to their son who does not have an opinion. Your boyfriend's parents will like a nice girl who will help cook dinner, play volleyball with their son. Really, just be yourself. And your boyfriend and his parents will love you for it!
You met an interesting guy, it's nice to spend your free time with him, chat on any topic. You meet for several months, start thinking about the wedding and dream of having children together.
And now your beloved guy announces to you that it is time to meet his parents and invites you to come to a gala dinner. Hearing such a statement from the lips of a loved one, you are in a state of shock and wonder how to make a good impression and what actions to take to please his closest relatives - parents?
The main thing in this situation is not to worry in vain and calm the shattered nerves. A walk in the park will help you relax and relieve stress. Sip chamomile tea and consider that your priority at this stage in your relationship with your lover is to establish a trusting, sincere and warm relationship with his mother and father.
After completing an informal meeting held in a narrow family circle, your loved one will ask his relatives what impression his potential bride and future wife made on them.
If during the solemn meeting you begin to demonstrate defiant, inadequate or contradictory behavior, you will not be able to make a good impression and please your parents. The recommendations below will help you not fall into the mud with your face in the company of the guy's parents, enlist their full support and approval.
- Be punctual. Come to the appointed meeting by the prearranged date, do not allow yourself to be late even for a few minutes, waste time on ridiculous explanations of your absence. Be sure that the parents of your beloved boyfriend will like a responsible and punctual girl who is able not to violate her obligations.
- Observe the rules of etiquette, try to demonstrate a modest and diligent behavior. Following this recommendation will surely help you please the next of kin of the guy - his mother and father. When you are at the festive table, you cannot laugh out loud, comment on the taste of dishes, look into space with an absent-minded and absent look, fidget in a chair or yawn at the top of your lungs.
- Take part in the conversation, make only relevant and meaningful remarks during the conversation. Listen carefully to what the parents of your beloved boyfriend say, never tell them the details of your personal life that you led before meeting their beloved son.
- Don't forget to help your parents as much as possible. You can offer your potential mother-in-law help in preparing festive dishes, helping to serve the festive table in accordance with the rules of etiquette. If you are going to visit the parents of your chosen one, do not forget to look into the grocery store to buy a delicious cake or a set of pastries.
- Look stylish. You can awaken a real male in your chosen one and evoke a storm of positive emotions in him by dressing in a revealing outfit - high-heeled shoes, fishnet stockings, a miniskirt, a T-shirt with an open neckline. This option will delight your boyfriend indescribably, but with a high degree of probability his parents will not like it. They will consider you a girl of easy virtue who is trying to fool their son and get rich at someone else's expense.
- Reasonable questions arise about what kind of clothes parents will like and how to create a unique and memorable image. The ideal option is to put on a skirt that has a length below the knee and a pastel-colored blouse. Surely the guy's parents belong to the category of people of the "old school" and puritanical views. They are sincerely convinced that a modern girl is not decorated with jewelry and revealing outfits, but with a radiant smile and natural modesty. To please the mother and father of your fiancé, show goodwill and courtesy.
- Don't brag while talking. Avoid any mention of your achievements and merits, do not seek to appear in a favorable light and receive universal approval. You should not advertise the fact that your own dad is an oligarch or a deputy. You can not mention the high level of their material security, existing family ties with famous people, belonging to high society. If you boast of your popularity or wealth, look down on the guy's relatives, you will never be able to please them and establish a trusting relationship with them.
Use the tips below to ensure that your meeting with parents ends with the creation of a trusting and warm relationship between all participants in the meeting.
The first meeting with the parents of the chosen one. How to make a good impression?
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Sooner or later in the life of every girl there comes a moment when acquaintance with the parents of a loved one cannot be bypassed. This is especially true for those who are for their chosen one. It is wrong to assume that only she is nervous, because the guy's parents and he himself are also anxiously waiting for this meeting. You can’t let everything take its course, and the girl must definitely prepare. Both morally and simply find this article and read it. So let's pretend that day has come. But what to do and how to behave? All this, and more, you will learn further.
Consider the interests of his mother
In order to please the people you are going to visit, consider their interests. It is important to know the topics that are not raised in their presence and vice versa, what they want to talk about with new people. Perhaps one of them has an interesting profession and they are proud of it.
Look decent
As the saying goes: "Meet by clothes, see off by the mind." And it is true. It is unlikely that in the first seconds of the meeting, the guy's parents will be able to appreciate your huge inner world and intellectual level of development, so dress in such a way that there is no doubt about your modesty. And if we consider that every girl’s wardrobe should have an elegant black dress, then the next question: “What to wear?” - should not occur. It will be beautiful, modest and tasteful.
Respect her attitude towards her son
You should be interested in everything that offers to discuss, or show your boyfriend's mother. Take advantage of this: talking with the parents of the chosen one will help you learn better. Remember, a mother is unlikely to talk to you about some trifles, more often these are things that are dear to her: photographs, diplomas, cups, and other children's things of your loved one. Treat with understanding, because you are shown the happy childhood of the second half.
Try to be nice
Don't go to a meeting empty-handed. Find out what is interesting to the people you are going to. Perhaps mom is fond of flowers in pots, and dad is fishing, and you can please them with small presents. But if suddenly, for some reason, it is not possible to purchase gifts, you can bake something sweet for tea, and thereby.
Do not panic!
In any case, the situation of acquaintance is not an everyday trip to the store for bread, it will be awkward, even if you are an angel, and your parents are incredibly kind and bright people. The main thing is not to be nervous. If something goes wrong and you are confused, try to think about what makes you happy: maybe the next meeting with your friends will cheer you up, or a planned shopping trip will make you relax and smile.
Perhaps this is all you need to know for this difficult and forced meeting. Do not be nervous, everything will definitely go the way you want. Just remember the tips above and be yourself!
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Orthodox calendar
Wednesday, September 25, 2019(September 12 O.S.)
15th week after Pentecost
Commemoration of the Feast of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary
Shmch. Autonoma, Ep. Italian (313)
Saints' Day:
Rev. Athanasius Vysotsky, Serpukhov miracle worker (1395). Shmch. Kornuta, Ep. Nicomedia (Iconian) (c. 249-259). Mch. Julian and with him 40 martyrs (IV). Rev. Vassian of Tiksna (1624). Transfer of the relics of rights. Simeon of Verkhotursky (1704). Shmch. Bishop Theodora Alexandria.
Memorial Day of Confessors and New Martyrs of the Russian Church:
Sshmchch. Theodore Lebedev, John Prudentov, Nikolai Zhitov presbyters, martyr. Alexy Voroshin (1937).
Lent day.
Readings of the day
Gospel and Apostle:
In lit.: -Ap.: Gal.3:15-22 Ev.: Mark 6:7-13
Psalter:
Morning: - Ps.70-76; Ps.77-84 For eternity: - Ps.85-90
Finally, it's done! Your chosen one decided to introduce you to mom and dad. Serious step! Well, for you, the upcoming meeting with your parents is a real test. If the feelings for the guy are strong, and you see him as your future husband, then you clearly want to please your potential mother-in-law and father-in-law. What is needed for this and how to behave at the first meeting?
Preparing to meet with parents
We will prepare thoroughly for such a responsible event as getting to know the groom's parents.
Some frivolous persons are not too worried about this, hoping for their natural charm and that everything will work out by itself.
But smart girls do things differently. After all, the best impromptu is well-prepared.
What to wear to visit?
There is a good middle ground here. On a modern girl who follows fashion, too modest an outfit will look unnatural. But something trendy and frank is clearly not for this occasion.
Pick something neutral that you like and feel comfortable in. It’s not worth buying a new thing on purpose, you need to get used to the new outfit.
Light natural make-up, low-key manicure and natural hairstyle will complement your look.
Is it a good gift for parents?
With presentations, the situation is rather ticklish. An expensive gift may not be affordable for you, and it will put your parents in an awkward position. And there is no point in giving some trinkets. And you hardly know what exactly to choose for the guy’s mom, his dad, and, possibly, grandparents - you can’t deprive one of the family members.
Therefore, wait with gifts. But the cake (wonderful if baked by you personally) would be quite appropriate.
Or you can buy good tea or coffee by asking the guy what they like more in his family.
What information should be known in advance?
Although a personal acquaintance with the parents has not yet taken place, you need to find out what their names (first name, patronymic) are in advance. And try not to confuse unpronounceable options out of excitement.
Ask your chosen one what topics should not be touched upon in a conversation. Perhaps, in addition to traditional taboos (politics, religion, diseases, the national question), there is something else that is forbidden to discuss.
Rules of conduct visiting the boyfriend's parents
Getting to know your parents, of course, will require a lot of effort from you, because even the most worthy girl for most mothers is still not a match for her beloved son.
Well, if dating sites helped you find each other, the rating of Russia for which is quite high today, the situation is even more complicated. Many parents do not approve of this way of finding a second half. How to win over potential mothers-in-law?
Naturalness
Be yourself - otherwise the pretense will betray you with your head. Your boyfriend's shrewd mom will know you're impersonating someone else. Show your artistic abilities elsewhere. And natural behavior is usually conducive to itself.
benevolence
Meeting the parents of a loved one is a joyful event for you, right? So smile and radiate positivity. But without fanaticism, of course. A smile that has not left your face all evening will at least cause bewilderment.
By the way, you may not be met as friendly as you would like. And you keep the brand and keep up with dignity and benevolence, even if you encounter a clearly hostile attitude.
manner of communication
You are a well-mannered and well-mannered girl, so you know that you need to answer questions (and there will be many!) calmly, politely and preferably briefly. Do not immediately "load" the guy's parents with detailed stories from the life of your family.
Neither mom nor dad of the groom will like it if slang words accidentally slip through the conversation. So be careful with your speech.
Emotional outbursts (oh, what a cute little cat you have!) Are also inappropriate. You can express your admiration for something more restrained.
With compliments, too, look, do not overdo it. To praise a delicious treat, a beautiful handmade tablecloth, an abundance of indoor flowers is a must, but one should not admire everyone in a row.
Listening skills
Even if you are a talker by nature, you will have to hold your tongue. Soloing at a party is indecent, let the mistress of the house speak more. And she, of course, will want to tell you a lot of interesting things about her son. Listen carefully and ask questions occasionally.
Show interest in the history of the family, its traditions, and the hobbies of the parents. You will be told a lot of interesting things. And your genuine interest will be appreciated.
Etiquette at the table
Let not a dinner party, but you will definitely have a tea party. Without this, acquaintance with the parents is unlikely to do. Do not need to be reminded how to behave at the table? We keep our back straight, we don’t put our elbows on the table, we eat carefully and slowly.
And in no case do we try to relieve quite understandable tension with alcohol! A glass of champagne or wine will suffice for the evening.
And do not succumb to the provocations of the pope with his regular toasts. Otherwise, confusion cannot be avoided.
You need to unobtrusively offer your help in setting the table (or cleaning the dishes). But do not insist, otherwise mom will decide that you are somehow too actively invading her space and aiming for the role of hostess. But today is only the first acquaintance!
Topics for communication
It's good when the family has pets - here's a great topic for conversation. The owners will not get tired of talking about their pet. Take an interest in the recipe for this delicious pie or airy cakes. The guy's mom will willingly share her culinary secrets.
Ask to see an album with pictures of your chosen one in childhood and family photos. Parents are always pleased to review memorable shots and accompany them with their comments and memories.
You know that the family loves watching good old Soviet films together - show your knowledge of the classics as well. Even if you watch only the latest foreign films.
Acquaintance with parents, of course, will not do without detailed inquiries. Be prepared to talk about your family, your studies, work, hobbies, habits. But only the most important and without unnecessary details.
Typical mistakes when meeting a guy's parents
Perhaps the first meeting with the groom's parents will not go as smoothly as we would like. Just try not to make some mistakes and misses in the process of dating:
- Avoid comparisons in favor of your family. Your mother's pies are more lush and rich, but you should not emphasize this. Do not use phrases like "but we are preparing this ..." or "we have ...".
- Don't get into arguments. Keep your point of view to yourself. Different generations have their own views on literally everything - from fashion to raising children. A girl who passionately defends her opinion may seem too obstinate and assertive to the guy's parents.
- Do not try to please mom and dad in everything. Nodding your head happily and assenting in response to any statement - this will be perceived as fawning.
- Address the guy by name (but not Petyunya, Sashulya or Andryushechka). Obviously, his parents will be jarred and the appeal to his son in their presence such as “cat” or “bunny”.
- Tomorrow will you carry an application to the registry office? Still, you should not show your parents your tender relationship. Kisses and hugs - this is later, alone. But if the guy lightly hugs you by the shoulders, you don’t need to break out indignantly either.
No doubt, getting to know the parents of your chosen one will require you to maximize your concentration of strength and attention. But this is your chance to make a favorable impression and please potential relatives. So, the first acquaintance with the groom's family, how to behave - see this video: