Is it worth giving people a second chance? Is it worth giving people a second chance? He tries, she doubts.

There are many reasons why a person missed his first chance. Someone will be disappointed by one-time minor misconduct, which has accumulated so much that patience simply burst. Someone will come into shock from the lies of a loved one, from undeserved resentment. In the worst case, betrayal could also occur. But if a person asks to give him another chance, and, moreover, his words are very sincere, then you need to think deeply.

The cause of discord can be the accumulated misunderstanding, based on a number of accidents and minor skirmishes. There was a crisis, but you understand that if you treat each other more carefully, this can be avoided. Relationships are also work on yourself. If this understanding has come to both partners, then such a couple definitely deserves a second chance.

Some people can act selfish until a shock occurs. For example, your partner was frivolous, allowed himself to stay up late without warning you, could ignore your requests. But when you confronted him with the fact that they didn’t intend to tolerate such neglect anymore, he suddenly realized how wrong he was. Such insights do happen. In this case, the person deserves a second chance.

Why You Shouldn't Give a Second Chance

It happens that a person’s misconduct was in your favor: you were tired of these relationships for a long time and thought about how to break them as gently as possible. Of course, the situation could turn out to be far from mild, but if you are sure that you do not want to maintain your previous relationship, then do not agree to give out a second chance. A person's arguments can be very different, ranging from the fact that it all happened by chance to listing what binds you (long relationship, children, joint business, housing, etc.), but stand your ground. Even if he emphasizes that your common child needs both parents, this is not a reason to stay in a relationship just for this reason.

You should not give a second chance to someone who has serious psychological problems and does not intend to solve them. For example, if your partner is a chronic alcoholic or drug addict, if he raised his hand against you or a child several times, constantly tried to humiliate you, or he already had several cheating, then he does not deserve the next chance. The very fact that the problem is chronic suggests that you already gave him a second chance, and he failed. The sooner you stop it, the better for both you and him.

It happens that a person really made a mistake. You are very hurt by what is happening, but he, too, most likely is not better. He is tormented by guilt. If you understand that repentance is genuine, and the partner is not going to allow anything like this ever again, then giving a second chance may be worth it. But be aware of your feelings. Think about it, you can. It happens that feelings remain the same, but forgiveness is already more and more difficult. On the one hand, the ability to forgive is a great blessing, but on the other hand, some events are indeed unforgivable.

What is the result

Probably, any person to whom you have genuine feelings deserves a second chance rather than not. But any person, rather, does not deserve a third, despite your feelings.

IN modern society people are tied up various relationships in which it is impossible to do without joys, nor without sorrows and disappointments. Resentment is one of the most common types of negative experience in communication; it occurs when a person has failed, failed to live up to hopes, trusts, and expectations. And then the question arises: what to do if you were really let down and Is it worth giving people a second chance?? Many believe that this is not worth doing, since after the second chance, a third, fourth, and so on will be required. Let's try to figure out if this is really the case.

Second chances in friendship - is it wise?

Most likely, betrayal in friendship is the result of a more serious process in personal growth. When one person works on himself and strives to develop further, and the second calmly stands in one place, they become uninteresting with each other, there is a feeling of alienation, and then neglect of a friend and betrayal. Or maybe the person has matured, internally changed, he had a change of priorities. Or maybe he just doesn't care at all.

If a friend tells others your secrets - this is not normal, over time you will simply stop trusting her. If quarrels often arise over trifles, then life turns into a nightmare that occurs according to a certain pattern.

If you are no longer interested in your friend, is there any point in continuing to communicate and trying to establish a lost contact?

A broken flower cannot be brought back to life. A leaf plucked from a branch will no longer take root back. And it seems to many that what is broken can no longer be restored. On the one hand, this thought is true, but on the other hand: life is already too bitter, joy is highly valued in it. Is it really worth depriving yourself of the joy of communicating with a person with whom it has always been good, or is it still worth giving a chance? Here you need to proceed from the gravity of the situation, and personal feelings and thoughts.

A second chance at love - does it make sense?

One of the most important qualities of love is the unquestioning acceptance of a person as he is. No one has the right to change a person, even the closest person has no right to do this. But you can influence a loved one, namely by your actions, behavior, conversations. If there is no acceptance on the part of the partners, they are constantly in conflict with each other, reconciliation is difficult for them, they do not want to give in - this is question number two.

When a life partner changes, the person who has always been heaven for you is very painful. Resentment simply breaks the soul and heart into pieces, the desire to live disappears. But life does not end there, you need to accept important decision: cut off relations or compromise? If there is no desire in your soul to forgive and give a second chance, in the future the relationship can hardly be built again. But if a loved one takes an oath that this will not happen again - sit down and judge. If you cannot live without him, give him an attempt to improve, but never forgive the third, and even more so the fourth time.

Business relations: are there any chances?

Not only a close person can let you down, but also a business partner or employee. If a person is systematically late for meetings or violates obligations, shows irresponsibility or has caused a larger trouble, it is not good to leave this unattended.

The inconsistency of a partner or employee invariably harms the external face of the company, therefore, in the business sphere, deliveries and unjustified expectations must be prevented.

Direct conversation is one of the most effective techniques fight against violations of discipline and business ethics. Start the conversation by explaining your positions, principles, generally accepted requirements. Severely reprimand, issue a fine, deduct a percentage of income, cut back on professional duties, or simply threaten to terminate a partnership or employment contract - the specific decision is up to you. In the business sphere, a person can and even should be given a chance: he will certainly improve in the future. But if the situation repeats itself, there is no third chance.

Second chance: arguments for and against

According to psychologists and sociologists, it is possible to give a second chance to a person in any relationship if:

Along with this, radically change the strategy of relationships in order to avoid repeating mistakes and problems. To do this, just take a look at the current situation from the outside and make your verdicts.
Reflect and find the reason, the obstacle in the formation of strong relationships and try to fix everything in order to avoid trouble in the future.
A person is too dear to you, he is not just a habit and a successful filling of free minutes of life. You cannot imagine life without him and are ready to forgive. Note that similar feelings should arise from both sides.

If an unpleasant situation is a repetition of a previous experience, this is a clear argument against the possibility of a second chance. Also, do not scatter your trust to the wind if you do not see a future with a particular person.

Is it worth giving people a second chance and why?

Forgiving people is always necessary, but forgiveness does not imply a complete restoration of relationships. The second chance is a purely personal matter, and a person must make a decision on his own, based on his life experience. However, you should not be too strict with others: after all, people tend to make mistakes, and every person has the right to make a mistake. That is why a second chance must be given. Maybe a person is deeply aware of what happened and will never repeat the mistake in his life. And you will receive in his person a reliable support, a devoted friend.

Another thing is that this bug-fix should not be the system. When making an important decision, take into account the individual characteristics of the personality of a particular person. Maybe even 18 chances will not be enough for him: here you should think about yourself. Is it necessary to poison your life with endless problems, or is it still worth breaking with it?

In any case, you can give the opportunity to improve in any situation, but with the agreement that it is only one, the next time everything will turn out to be much more difficult. Say it to your opponent's face directly, without hesitation. After all, you are not some kind of vegetable to be constantly, unconditionally subjected to humiliation, insult, disappointment - you are a person. And remember that there is something that cannot be forgiven to anyone - this is violence, both physical and moral. There is no need to even waste time thinking about whether to give people a second chance: the risk of repeating sadistic methods is great. Restore relationships with those whom you truly love, without whom you cannot live, and in whom you really have confidence. Know the value of yourself, your well-being and pure relationships between people!

Which couples are likely to rekindle their relationship?

There are many cases when broken relationships are resumed again, and life is getting better. In what cases can an attempt be successful:

When people realize mistakes - their own and their halves or a friend. Such a person seeks to change himself and his life for the better.
Careful analysis of errors will help prevent the emergence of conflicts in the future or correctly assess contentious issues. One cannot do without friction and disagreement in life, it is important to get out of difficult situations with the least losses.
After parting, tears into the pillow, consolations of friends, returning a person again means treating your partner with even more love and reverence. If you first turn on the head, and then emotions, then the union will only grow stronger.
Provided that the partner made a mistake once. There shouldn't be third or fourth attempts. Once you can come to understanding and forgiveness.
If both parties to the conflict begin to control themselves, reorganize new way Show love for your soul mate.
If the breakup was just a manipulation, an attempt to get attention.
If the partners have many common interests related to the family, children.

People should be given a second chance, but it will only be successful if a few conditions are met. First, you must clearly decide what you want: joint leisure, special attention, moral support. Once you've made up your mind, convey it to your partner. Secondly, look for new ways to fulfill these desires. Find a compromise relationship model to feel the presence of each other in life. Don't agonize over whether to give a second chance in a relationship. Renew the connection, just try to modify it.

When will there not be a second chance?

Second attempt: will it be successful? Do not even doubt whether it is worth giving a person a second chance. You always need to give your partner the opportunity to change and become better yourself. The desire to return and connect with a loved one is caused by nostalgia or a feeling of loneliness. Anger and irritation disappear somewhere, only good memories remain: dates, declarations of love, affectionate words. Re-establishing a connection is possible only in 50% of cases. And those who try to return their soul mate several times in a row are only wasting time and nerves. Here are the cases in which there will be no second chance and mutual understanding will not improve:

if the partners never found that stumbling block that prevented them from being together;
if someone of the spouses does not want to yield and insists on his own;
if a person is irresponsible about the opportunity to start all over again, does not value union or friendship.

Before you decide whether to give a person a second chance, understand that nothing will get better on its own. If your breakup was due to the fact that you did not see a future with this person, then do not hope for a quick improvement in the situation. You need to endure the pain of a breakup, but it will be better to move forward.

Separation factor analysis

There are good reasons behind every breakup. There are factors of separation quite insignificant: inattention, misunderstanding. It doesn't even say whether it's worth giving a person a second chance. But when it comes to lies, betrayal, treason, not everyone can forget everything and start over. A big offense cannot be quickly forgotten, it will still destroy the renewed connection. Not every man or woman can forgive for some serious flaws. Before you make up, think about whether you have the strength to forget everything.

Separation is unbearable

Relationships are formal and informal. Formal include living together, cares, life. The emotional and sensual sphere is behind informal relationships. Even if you left or parted, then at the level of feelings you can constantly remember your soul mate and count on her. After all, it is impossible to completely erase a person from memory.

Many psychologists advise not to completely end the relationship, but to become friends. When people live together, they get used to each other very much and even when they part, they continue to be together on a psychological level. If you part as friends, you can quickly recover from such an addiction.

Conclusions must be drawn by both

Often the reason for parting is disagreement. Learn to express your thoughts to your loved ones, do not expect them to guess about your desires. It is important to consider that the psychology of a man is slightly different than that of a woman. If you decide to give a guy a second chance, does it make sense to keep in yourself what you lacked. It is important that the need to restore communication arises for both. If there is confidence in the feelings on both sides, then you can try to glue the broken bowl together.

Disappointment also has advantages. With this feeling, you learn to accept people for who they are. Don't have illusions about perfect person because you also have flaws. Both partners must understand if there is a place for each other in their lives.

He tries, she doubts

What can be forgiven and what cannot? You should not return to narcissistic half-wits, lovers to give up, playboys, sissies. If your boyfriend does not belong to the above list, then give him a second chance. Even if he offended you, you may be angry for a while, but then look at everything with sober eyes. If the guy is trying to demonstrate his feelings and wants forgiveness, then give him this opportunity. Do not hesitate for a long time, perhaps it is just as hard for him as it is for you.

This is true love

If you are ready to sacrifice something and make compromises, then the second attempt may end in success. Arrange a meeting, discuss what did not suit you, and find a common solution.

If you had other connections after a breakup, but still thought about your boyfriend, then you just can’t let go of your past. Honestly admit to yourself - do you still love him? A positive answer indicates that you need to try again. In order to forgive, a person must be loved.

Starting over is not easy

Do you still doubt whether to give a second chance in a relationship? Use the tips, who should still go forward. Try to return the relationship if you generally like the guy, but you see some shortcomings in him. It is worth forgiving a person with a difference in worldview, a soft and indecisive personality. Also be loyal to a guy who does not have the opportunity to show secular gloss.

Don't save relationships alone. If your loved one does nothing for this, then humble yourself, because you yourself will not achieve anything. Also, do not hope for an instant happy life after the reunion. Take it slow, don't rush. If you and your soul mate take a few steps towards each other, then understanding and happiness await you.

Men are much more honest than women when it comes to relationships. At the beginning, sure.

A woman, having gone on the first date, may agree to the second, even if the man did not hook her. “I'll give him a second chance,” she says, and goes to dinner with Lukashin or Novoseltsev. A woman is ready to give a second chance to a man not only after the first date, but also after the first night.

The women, being in their right mind and full of memory, voluntarily, that is, themselves, subscribe to the peasants, from whom they are not blown away. They marry them, have children. And then, tormented by a poor-quality sex life, they saw their “non-eagles” for the rest of their lives. Didn't endure. Didn't like it. No matter how hard the poor woman tried, but, alas, it did not grow together.

As his nose “peep” or uncertain manner of speech irritated her on the first date, it irritates her to this day, after some years there life together. How disgusting her were his slobbery kisses and thin penis on the first night together, so disgusting they are now, when they have already gathered and submitted an application to the registry office. But the grandmother is patient. Doesn't lose hope. It is unclear, however, to what.

For the vast majority of men, such a model of behavior is alien. A man will never invite a woman on a romantic date whom he does not want to blow. Exceptions are gigolos. Although, in the case of them, only the surroundings can be romantic, but not the intentions. Also, a man will not invite a woman who disappointed him on the first one to a second date, and he will not call the one with whom he did not like it there.

If a man is disgusted by something in a woman, he will not be with her. A friend of mine really liked a girl. When she finally arrived at his house and took off her boots, he saw she was wearing nylon socks. How cut. And I understand him perfectly: with a woman who wears nylon socks, only cattle will meet.

So, ladies, at least at the initial stage of the relationship, they are honest with us. He does not call for a long time, because he did not like you enough to call you in the very first free minute. He's fine without you. For the same reason, he does not invite you on a date and does not pull you into bed. Shyness, employment, force majeure have nothing to do with it, no matter how much the rejected women would like to believe in them.

Here is a dialogue from the True Detective series. The main character is trying to bring the wife of his partner to a woman.

Better two, Rust. You should approach each other if you give her a chance. But men don't give a chance. I don't understand why.
- Because we know what we want and don't mind being alone.

Do you think it is necessary to give a person a second chance at the initial stage of a relationship? Try to justify your point of view.

Name: Carlson

Good day! Straight to the point:
At the beginning of this year, I met a girl. I met by chance, my friend, turned out to be her neighbor. We are friends with him, not a lot, not a little, 3 years. So here she is, his upstairs neighbor. Apparently surprised me at the moment when I saw her, that I had never noticed before. Of course I asked him what and how. He told me a lot of positive things about her. To which I replied that in 2 months, she would be my girlfriend. (strange, but from the outside, it looks like “meeting for an argument”) I started talking to her.
And oh gods! I did not notice in her any commercialism, nor greed, nor a share of selfishness. It made me very happy, and actually it hooked me. (apart from a very nice appearance and a slender figure) By the way, I'm 20, she's 18. We talked with her for 2 months. I knew that I was starting to fall in love with her. One day, on occasion, I kissed her. And a week later, officially, he beautifully made an offer to be a girl. To which, of course, she agreed.
Met. The first 3 months everything is just amazing, I will not tell the details, they are already similar to everyone. Candy-bouquet period, night walks, both on foot and by car. In general, everything is beautiful! But. But little by little, I began to move away from her, which I now regret. I began to pay little attention to her. Walked with friends, lied to her that he was wildly busy at home. I could not call or write. She, in turn, did not give a single reason for a quarrel. Not a single reason for jealousy, and experiences like “where is she? who is she with? She always sat at home, and if she wanted to take a walk with her friends, she called and asked if it was possible? And the fact is that I did not demand such an attitude from her. I did not demand to report and exclude all communication with the male sex. She is all by herself.
I departed from the topic. So, I began to move away. She asked, almost begged, to give her more time. And I didn't pay any attention to it. She offered to leave. On the same evening, I broke into her, (I heard the truth that the drunk was driving, well, something like that. She always worries about me) arrived, began to beg to change her mind. He began to promise that I would improve. She gave me a chance. Everything was fine for a week. I kept my promises. Then he went downhill again. She endured everything, forgave, but I did not change. I began to think that maybe I don’t love her at all. I thought it was time for us to part. It looks like both will be fine. But she got ahead of me, unable to stand it, she again told me this terrible phrase “we are parting.” And only after reading it, I realized for the first time, 100%, that I love her madly. That I don’t want to lose her, that I love everything in her to the smallest detail. I realized how bad I was, I'm ready to change everything for her, and on my knees I'm ready to ask for forgiveness for every mistake, but. But it was already too late. The next morning, with flowers, with a huge bouquet of flowers, I'm going to her university. She came out, talked to me, said that she didn’t want anything else and that it would be easier for her that way. I didn’t give her the flowers then, because it would be stupid to give them to her in the morning, so that she would do with them. Decided to come to her in the evening. He came and asked to leave. As soon as she opened the front door and saw me, she closed it at that hour without even giving me a word to say. I left flowers at the door. He himself sat down on the steps, lit a cigarette and sat like that for about 20 minutes (as it turned out later, she was sitting on the other side of the door and crying). The next day, I called her. We talked for 1.5 hours all this time she was crying. Couldn't even say a word. She cried, and I apologized and begged for a chance. She never agreed. She told me several times that she loves me very much! What worries about me, and that I should at least sometimes call her and say like me? Are you alive and well? I didn't have any clear answer.
I forgot to say, we broke up 2 weeks ago. All week now and then that I sit down on the ears of a friend and drink. He did not appear at the institute, took time off from work. I drink and I burn. Yesterday, on a drunken head, got into a fight. Somehow, not having estimated the lack of equality of forces (there were 4 of them), he climbed to fight. As a result, a broken rib, a concussion, bruises and abrasions. Called all the same friend, asked to come to the hospital. He took with him and (let it be Yulia) she flew with him, in tears, rushed to me. I found out how I am and what's wrong with me. I hugged you. And at that moment, I didn't need anything else. Everything seemed to be taken away from me by the fact that such native person hugged me. I began to apologize again, to say that I love you madly, that I could not live without her. She began to cry. Said I have a year. What I quote: “Let's try to find you - a girl, and I'm a guy, and if nothing good happens in a year, then we'll try something again. I can't take you back now. I don't have confidence in you. Sorry. Good luck with everything! I really want this! Find yourself a good girl…” At this point, I cut her off and said that I didn’t even want to look at others. She roared even more and snuggled up to me. For the first time in 12 years, I cried ... If my health allowed, I would fall on my knees to ask for forgiveness and ask for another chance ...
It all ended there. She took a taxi home from me.
Today, she left me songs on the page with a meaning like: (we were fine together, I didn’t forget anything, I miss you, etc., etc.)
And in addition the message “get well soon! And in order to have an incentive to get better, then as soon as you recover, we will go for a walk :) ”To say that I was happy with every letter of this message is to say nothing.
And now I don't know...
Guys, what to do? How to return? I really can't anymore...
There is information that while we are not together, one friend of hers hit her ... They even walked a couple of times and often visits her. But for some reason I'm sure that they didn't have anything serious there, and it's unlikely to be so far.

What to do? How can I get my beloved back before I completely lose her? Tell! I love her very much ... If you need something else, I will add it in the comments, or I will answer all questions.

Thank you for reading this entire petition.