How to calm a crying baby at night: simple ways. How to calm a baby when he cries: practical recommendations How to calm a baby in a month

For most of us, babies are adorable. True, only if the little one snores quietly in a dream or smiles funny (we recommend reading:). Frequent tantrums and tears infants, the causes of which are sometimes impossible to explain, cause adults to feel annoyed because of their own impotence. However, such emotions are a bad helper. It is very important to understand why a newborn cries and take appropriate measures. Consider the main reasons for tears in babies, and also find out how to calm crying baby.

When a baby cries, young parents often feel powerless.

physical discomfort

Why do newborn babies cry? Crying is due to various factors. One of them is an instinctive reluctance to be alone. If a child under 1 month old screams and cries in connection with this circumstance, then it is easy to calm him down: pick him up, look into his eyes, say something in a calm, gentle voice.

Did not help? It is likely that the newborn is crying because of a more serious problem - physical discomfort caused by uncomfortable clothing, improper room conditions, and so on. The exact reason can be understood by the way the baby cries:

Reason for cryingBehavioral featuresHow to calm the baby?
Wet clothes (diaper, diaper)The child hiccups, cries, fidgets, trying not to touch the wet.Remove wet clothes, clean and dry the skin, put on new underwear.
Uncomfortable clothing (improper swaddling)The baby begins to scream indignantly immediately after putting on new clothes or swaddling.Buttons, buttons, snakes, threads, crumbs or seams that dig into delicate skin can cause discomfort. Things may be too tight or hard. Clothing made from synthetic fabrics with dyes causes itching. The baby should be changed quickly.
Uncomfortable postureThe newborn whimpers, cries, waves his arms and legs, trying to change his position.The baby needs to be laid differently.
Too hot or coldThe baby sobs. Signs of overheating - hot and red skin, in advanced cases - a rash. Manifestations of hypothermia - pale and cold covers.The newborn should be changed according to the temperature conditions in the room.


The cause of fussy movements and crying of the child can be a wet diaper

Feeling hungry and feeding problems

A common reason newborns cry is hunger. In the first weeks, most babies “hang on their chest” almost all the time. Then lactation is established, and an approximate schedule is developed, however, at one of the meals, the baby may eat less than expected. Of course, he will begin to demand milk out of schedule and scream loudly. If, after being attached to the breast or bottle, the newborn quickly subsided, hunger was the cause of the crying.

The baby began to eat, but started crying again? So something is bothering him. Problems that may occur during or after feeding and lead to crying:

ProblemBehavioral featuresWhat to do?
Nasal congestionThe baby begins to suck on the breast or bottle, but then quits and screams in annoyance. Sniffling or snoring.Clean the nose with a special aspirator (pear), rinse with drops (saline), drip the drug for the common cold, prescribed by the doctor.
swallowed a lot of milkThe cry is short and not repetitive.Wait a bit.
OtitisWhen swallowing, the pain in the ear increases, so the baby stops eating and screams loudly.Drip vasoconstrictor drops into the nose, and special painkillers into the ears. Contact a doctor.
StomatitisA sign of candidal stomatitis (thrush) is a white coating on the oral mucosa. The kid feels a burning sensation and refuses to eat.Wipe the oral cavity with a weak soda solution (2%). Visit a doctor.
Specific taste of milk (mixture)The baby tries to eat, but then turns away from the breast or bottle.The use of certain products - onions, garlic, lamb and others - leads to a change in the taste of milk. They should not be eaten in large quantities. In addition, mom should not use cosmetics with a strong aroma.
Air entered the stomachImmediately after eating or during it, the baby pulls its legs to the stomach and screams.The baby needs to be taken in a "column", leaning his stomach against his chest. This will allow excess air to escape.


Chilled teether helps relieve pain and itching of swollen gums

It is wrong to immediately offer a breast or a bottle to a baby when he is crying. To begin with, you should pick it up, shake it. If these actions do not help to calm him down, the child cries pitifully and shows that he wants to eat - sucks his fists, smacks his lips, then feeding should not be postponed.

If the newborn is constantly crying, you should make sure that he is not starving. There are certain standards for weight gain in children up to a year. The baby should be periodically weighed and compared with the reference increase. The pediatrician should be informed about the lag in the pace - he will recommend how to increase the volume of feeding.

At artificial feeding the child often cries not from hunger, but from thirst. Mom needs to always have a bottle of drinking water ready.

Colic and increased gas production

Why is the baby crying all the time? At the age of 1-3 months, many children suffer from colic - severe painful cramps in the abdomen due to stretching of the intestinal walls with gas bubbles. The main sign of colic is that the baby cries piercingly inconsolably for a long time, taking short breaks. Additional symptoms:

  • redness of the face;
  • "knee" with legs;
  • flatulence (hard stomach);
  • clenching fists.

Colic is associated with the immaturity of the digestive system of babies, but malnutrition or the nervous tension of a nursing mother can aggravate the situation. For most children, the problem is solved when they are 3-4 months old.

What to do if the child is crying due to abdominal pain? You can calm him down in one of the following ways:

  • put something warm on the tummy - a diaper ironed with an iron or a heated bag with flax seeds;
  • make a massage - with a warm hand, stroke around the navel in a clockwise direction;
  • put the baby on the stomach (not all children like this position);
  • to vilify the baby vertically so that excess air comes out;
  • lay the baby on his back and give him the “frog” position - bend the legs at the knees and connect the feet, thanks to this, gases escape more easily, another effective exercise– imitation of cycling;
  • give a medicine for colic prescribed by a doctor (Espumizan, Sab Simplex, Bobotik, BabyKali, etc.), or dill water (we recommend reading:);
  • put the child with his bare stomach on his stomach, ensuring skin-to-skin contact;
  • put the baby in the sling facing you.

Problems emptying the bladder or bowels

Why else does a baby have to cry? Possible reasons- cystitis and constipation. Inflammation Bladder(cystitis) is accompanied by pain during urination and fever. The condition requires urgent medical attention.

If the baby cries during a bowel movement or pushes and does not poop, he has constipation. Frequent problems with bowel movements can lead to the appearance of cracks in the rectum. The problem should be reported to the pediatrician. As a symptomatic therapy, you can use:

  • microclysters Microlax;
  • glycerin suppositories;
  • Lactulose syrup (has a delayed effect, causing stool the next day).

Constipation can be the cause of excruciating discomfort in a child.

Some Physiological Causes of Crying

Why else infant sometimes crying? The sobbing of a newborn can be triggered by various painful conditions:

StateessenceSymptomsHow to help a crying baby?
"Breast migraine"Infants who were diagnosed at birth with perinatal encephalopathy (PEP) can suffer from headaches. This syndrome is characterized by increased pressure inside the skull, nervous excitability, impaired muscle tone (increase or decrease).Attacks of "baby migraine" occur when weather conditions change, atmospheric pressure drops. In addition, windy, cloudy or rainy weather can cause a headache. At the same time, the baby screams, sleeps poorly, and shows anxiety. Vomiting, indigestion may occur.In such a situation, it is impossible to do without the help of a specialist. It is necessary to visit a pediatrician or a neurologist and talk about the problem.
Diaper rash (diaper rash)Due to the contact of the baby's skin with feces and urine, its acid-base balance is disturbed. The result is a painful irritation.Signs of diaper dermatitis:
  • rash and redness in the area of ​​the perineum and buttocks;
  • irritability of the child;
  • crying that gets worse when changing diapers.
Necessary:
  • use a healing agent (Bepanten cream);
  • change diapers in a timely manner;
  • thoroughly cleanse the skin;
  • periodically arrange "air baths".

If the irritation is very strong, a doctor's consultation is required to prescribe treatment.

TeethingWhen a baby is teething, the gums swell, itch, and become painful.The baby sobs, pulls everything into his mouth to "nibble." He has increased salivation. In some cases, there is an increase in body temperature.Itchy gums can be "scratched" with a finger wrapped in a sterile bandage. Good way help - a cooled teether. In addition, there are anesthetic gels that can be applied to the mucous membrane. At temperatures above 38.5 ° C, it is worth giving an antipyretic.


If the baby cries piercingly for a long time, and it was not possible to find out the cause, you need to seek medical help

Psychological discomfort

Consider why a newborn baby can still cry, because the reasons are not only physical, but also psychological. The most frequent of them are appeal, protest and accumulated fatigue:

  1. The child cries on the rise, if he wants to attract the attention of an adult. The summoning cry does not last long and repeats at short intervals. The volume gradually increases. If you come to the baby, then he will calm down. Dr. Komarovsky does not advise immediately taking the crumbs in your arms. You can pet him or talk to him.
  2. If a newborn child begins to cry in protest, then the cry is sharp and occurs immediately after the "inappropriate" action. Such necessary procedures as changing clothes, cutting nails, cleaning ears can lead to indignation. They should be brought to the end, and then caress the baby.
  3. If the baby has become moody and sobs a lot, he is probably tired. Hysteria can be provoked by too long wakefulness, a large number of strangers around, a lot of impressions and events during the day.
  4. If a newborn cries every time before going to bed, the daily routine is incorrect. Overwork prevents him from calming down.

The crying of a child due to fatigue can be calmed as follows:

  • complete / exclude mobile and emotional games;
  • ventilate the room and humidify the air in it;
  • switch to calm communication;
  • shake, sing a lullaby;
  • put to bed, give a pacifier.


If the child is tired, you should calmly lay him down, help him fall asleep

You can prevent the crying of an infant by observing a certain sequence of actions (ritual) every night. For most babies, this combination helps to fall asleep: bathing - feeding - laying in the crib - turning off the main lights - turning on the nightlight - lullaby.

If the reason for crying a newborn at the age of 1-3 months is psychological discomfort, the advice of the American doctor Harvey Karp will help to quickly lull him to sleep:

  1. Swaddling. It is not necessary to constantly wrap the baby in diapers, but wrapping up will help to quickly calm the child, who is naughty and cries before going to bed. It is important to close the handles. It is better to use modern elastic diapers.
  2. wiggle. If a newborn rolls up and cries, it is worth shaking it. The baby should be picked up so that he lies on his side and start smooth movements with a small amplitude.
  3. "White noise". The child is helped to soothe hissing sounds, uttered in a quiet voice. Their reproduction is recommended to be combined with rhythmic motion sickness.
  4. Sucking. Is the baby crying inconsolably? The best way calm him down - give him the opportunity to satisfy the sucking reflex. A pacifier, mother's breast or a bottle with a small amount of mixture will help with this. However, the peanut should not be allowed to overeat.


Sometimes, to soothe a child, it is enough for a mother to shake him in her arms.

Calming a baby over 3 months old

A baby who cries constantly at 2 months old can be soothed by one of the methods described. If a baby is older than 3-4 months old, swaddling or “hissing” it does not make sense. During this period, the crying infant must be distracted from the problem that upset him:

  1. Using a sling. A child who cries a lot should be put in a sling and walked around the house with him, or even better, go outside (we recommend reading:

The first months of life the child adapts to new conditions. This is a tough time so positive attitude and comfortable conditions will favorably affect the psychological state of the family.

Any crying of a child causes anxiety in mothers. Gradually, the mother feels that she worries the baby and tries to help him. While the child and mother begin to recognize each other, it is necessary to find out the reasons for crying.

Reasons for crying baby

All the causes of an infant's disorder are difficult to perceive in the first weeks and months. Over time, the child will show emotions more clearly, and the mother will understand him better, eliminating anxiety.

Hunger

Often the child screams loudly and cannot calm down even in his arms. He tries to take his fist in his mouth, during a tantrum he does not immediately take a breast or a bottle.

The real reason is hunger. Having calmed down a little, he will begin to take food with pleasure.

Requires contact with mom and breasts to soothe

In this case, the child needs close contact with the mother. For a child, it is required to create conditions as close as possible to life in the stomach. Close space, warmth and chest. Rescues in such a situation tight swaddling. The child quickly calms down and falls asleep.

Wet diaper or diaper

Rather, you will hear annoying plaintive cries. Just check the diaper or change the diaper.

Tummy ache - flatulence

These cries are sharp, piercing, with great anxiety. Make impressionable parents empathize with the baby. The main thing is not to panic and solve the problem.

Up to three months, such crying can make parents worry. All because of an immature digestive system. It is believed that boys are affected more often than girls.

Hot or cold

Keep track of temperature and humidity. If you are cold or hot - this does not mean that the child feels the same. Determine the temperature that is comfortable for him and choose the right clothes both at home and on a walk.

The need to empty the bowels

You will find a crying child with legs tucked in. Most likely, he needs to free his tummy. You can help with a massage or a light pat on the bottom. Receptors transmit a signal to the brain and soon the child will easily empty himself.

Drowsiness

Cry intermittent. You can soothe a newborn by rocking it in your arms, lying on the bed, in a sling, in a stroller - in any usual way for a mother.

10 Ways to Calm Your Child

First of all, calm down yourself. A "sober" mind will only benefit. The child feels the state of the mother, so you need to be confident in your abilities.

Attach to your chest

Being close to a mother's warmth is soothing, so hold your baby to your breast. If the baby is hungry, he will eat. If the child is anxious, he will calm down. Carry your child on your side. It is more convenient for dads to do this, since they have a larger hand. Find a position in which the baby calms down, and the house will become calm.

Swaddle tightly

This allows the baby to assume the form in which he lived in the womb. He is not afraid of trembling arms and legs, he is warm in a diaper. Put the baby in the fetal position - on the side. Do not try to lay the child on his back, the back of the head gets discomfort. In the fetal position, the child feels calm. Lying on the left and right side allows the baby to quickly adapt to new conditions. And the vestibular apparatus from the first days is set in motion, albeit slightly.

Create bathing comfort

If a child cries while bathing, do not try to force him to wash. Create a comfortable water temperature. Inside the mother, he was in water at 36-37 ° C. The water in the bath should not be made hot. If it's not the water - postpone the procedure until the next time.

Newborn care consultants recommend using a sink bath. It is necessary to draw water into the sink, and wrap the baby in a diaper in a terry towel. Let the father gradually immerse the child in the water. The towel slowly gets wet, and the baby gradually feels the warmth of the water. You will notice that the child is calm. After immersion in water, you can unfold the towel, and then the diaper. Then, according to the standard scheme, wash the baby and wrap it in a dry towel, attach it to the chest.

Give dill water

Create white noise

Being in the mother's stomach, the child is used to listening to different sounds: heartbeat, rumbling, sounds surrounding the mother from the outside. Do not strive to create perfect silence with the tears of the crumbs. Turn on the vacuum cleaner or hair dryer - the child will calm down, while you will not scare him.

Rock me to sleep

Pediatrician Harvey Karp advises rocking the baby. It is necessary to put the child's head in your palms. Slowly start rocking. Harvey Karp claims that the baby experienced such a state in the uterus, and it is impossible to harm him.

Check the back of the child's head

If it is hot, take the temperature and remove some clothing. If it's cold, put an extra baby's undershirt on. In the same way, you can check the legs. Cold feet are not an indicator that a child is cold. Check the baby's calves: if they are not too cool, then it is not worth warming. Otherwise, put on extra booties.

Use rattles

Use distractions. Read poetry, sing a song with different intonation, take a rattle. Turn on classical music.

See an osteopath

If crying occurs during feeding, mainly on one side, it may be in the cervical spine. Since the bones are fragile, a displacement may occur, which is imperceptible, but acutely perceived by the child. If you experience these symptoms, see an osteopath.

Ride in a stroller

Riding in a stroller, wearing a sling that resembles a mother's womb, can soothe a baby in minutes.

What Not to Do

Crying for a long time can make a mother mad. Try not to lose your temper. If there is someone other than you at home, switch roles. You need to rest.

You can not abruptly throw a child, even on a soft bed, a fragile spine can be easily damaged. Do not shout, do not get angry - the child feels your mood. If you are not sure what the cause of crying is - do not rush to give him medication - the situation may worsen. Do not leave the baby alone, the state of loneliness will be added to his problem. In this case, he definitely will not calm down.

Strive to understand the child, give love and warmth. If it is difficult for you in the first days, you will soon learn to understand the child and quickly eliminate the causes of crying.

After a year, babies become very capricious. At the same time, some check the boundaries of what is permitted, others assert their territory and power, others ... Every whim has a reason, but we cannot always detect and eliminate it in time. How to calm the child at such a moment? How to prevent endless whims in the future? The answer depends on each specific situation.

Caprice or hysteria?

So, the situation has already "taken place": the baby became capricious. He cries, gets angry, whines, throws toys, protests, and perhaps even bursts into tears, beats his head against the wall or floor, arches involuntarily. Parents have yet to figure out the reasons that cause such behavior of the baby (and it is always an expression of some of his inner suffering), and we will deal with this a little later.

Now the main thing is to correctly respond to children's tears and calm the baby.

To do this, it is important to distinguish between two concepts: whim and hysteria. By external manifestations, they may be similar:

  • the child cries a lot, does not calm down for a long time;
  • can scream loudly, attracting the attention of others;
  • often the baby falls to the floor and beats his head or legs on the floor;
  • does not listen to the admonitions of adults;
  • expresses a clear protest against all the actions of parents.

However, whim differs from hysteria in that in the second case, the baby loses control over his actions, can reach exhaustion, even convulsions. At this moment, he is not aware of his actions, his nervous system is not subject to him. During a tantrum, the child does not hear what adults are saying to him, and cannot respond to the words. As a rule, a tantrum begins with a slight whim, when the baby shows conscious disobedience, but gradually grows to an uncontrollable state.

We calm the capricious

At the first manifestations of whims, you need to try to divert the attention of the crumbs to something more interesting. At 2 years old, this technique is still quite effective. If this does not help, it is important for parents to remain calm and composure, not to show any reaction to what is happening (although sometimes it is oh so difficult). Otherwise, the hysteria will pass, and the child will have the feeling that with its help you can achieve what you want, because when he cries, but does not yet become hysterical, he carefully observes who has what kind of reaction his “concert” causes. If the mother survived, but the grandmother trembled, in the future the baby will assert itself at her expense.

A whim is much easier to prevent than to stop later. You can try to offer the baby an alternative to what made him whimper (we can’t buy you this airplane now, but we can assemble it at home from your designer), or cheer him up with an unexpected joke, a funny song. In general - switch. Sometimes calm after such measures comes quite quickly.

When the hysteria nevertheless began, there should not be any reaction (and even more negative) from the parents. Now their goal is to rid the diverging child from the audience. If the scene unfolded at home, you can just leave the baby alone for a while, going about your business. If in a crowded place - take him away from people. To calm the baby, who himself is not able to do this, you can put him face to face on his knees, shake, hug; At home, you can turn on the music, arrange a warm bath for the baby.

In any case, it will be possible to talk with the child about the problem only when he completely calms down and is ready to listen and respond.

You can not make attempts to stop the tantrum, shout at the child, threaten, ridicule him, tease, give in to him out of shame in front of others. All this will give the child an indisputable trump card: the performance works!

If, despite all the measures taken, tantrums are repeated, are stormy and protracted, it makes sense to show the baby to a neurologist.

For everyone to sleep well

Many children, after a year, begin to “bumble” before going to bed: they don’t want to interrupt the games, they don’t want to part with their relatives until the morning, they want to dictate their own rules, or they just got overexcited during the day, and now the nervous system cannot calm down.

In the first cases, all the same whims take place, in the latter - an overstrain of the baby's nervous system. But both inevitably lead to the fact that none of the family members can get enough sleep.

You can help your baby calm down before going to bed when overexcited by the following actions.

  • All moving, noisy games and entertainment must be stopped at least an hour and a half before bedtime.
  • Evening bathing should take place without any games and toys, in warmer water than usual.
  • Relaxation will help light stroking massage (about 10-15 minutes).
  • Adding soothing herbs (succession, lavender) to bath water is good for calming children at night. You can put a bag with such herbs next to the crumbs on the bed or brew him a children's soothing tea.
  • Compliance with the regimen, when laying down occurs strictly at a certain time, also helps the nervous system to rebuild in time and better cope with emotional stress.
  • For the same purpose, it is important to always follow the established rituals before going to bed.
  • You can tell your baby a calm fairy tale or sing a lullaby - a monotonous voice will help him calm down and relax.
  • One of the best "soothing" for toddlers are mother's smell, heartbeat, a sense of her closeness; therefore, you can, for example, put a baby’s crib next to an adult, or allow him to take his mother’s thing with him to the crib, a toy made by his mother’s hands or bought by her.
  • If the evening whims, despite all the measures, still remain a system, you can shift the child’s bedtime by 30-40 minutes - perhaps he just needs to fall asleep a little earlier. This is especially true if every day by the time of laying down the baby shows clear signs of fatigue.

We find out the reasons

When the child completely calms down, you need to calmly and on an equal footing discuss what happened with him. Not scolding, accusing or threatening - after all, the baby was naughty due to the fact that his nervous system was already so bad - but trying to find out what caused the "mutiny on the ship."

The child is still quite small to tell himself clearly and sensibly what is happening. Therefore, show maximum participation, ask in detail, asking many leading questions. Formulate them so that the baby can understand you: do you feel resentment? you're scared? why? do you have any pain?..

What can cause tantrums?

  • Physical suffering. The kid is tired, wants to eat, sleep, is overexcited, something hurts him. He himself cannot formulate this yet, and the nervous system is looking for a way to unload.
  • Attention deficit. For example, they play and communicate little with the baby (parents are busy at work or around the house), he feels unnecessary, unloved and abandoned. This can happen even after an illness, if during the illness he was given maximum attention, everyone jumped in front of him “on their hind legs”, trying to fulfill any whim, if only it would be easier for him. And now he wants to "continue the banquet."
  • Desire to manipulate elders. This is a direct manifestation of the crisis of the first year of life. The kid seeks to win respect, to force adults to obey themselves, to probe the boundaries of what is permitted. And sometimes the abuse of the attention of adults is caused in the crumbs by an excessive manifestation of the love of others for him.
  • Riot against overprotection. It is important for a kid at this age to establish himself as an independent person. And when his hands are constantly “tied” with total bans, this causes a natural reaction - to do it out of spite.
  • The desire to achieve something very important, which parents refuse for reasons that are still difficult for the child to understand (they don’t buy a toy or sweets, they don’t let them go out, etc.).
  • Nervous situation in the family: constant scandals, screams, tears, perhaps even violence. In this case, the baby's nervous system is constantly under tremendous stress. The whole world seems to him evil, set against him - so unnecessary and poor. And the best defense, as you know, is an attack, the accessible form of which for a small child is hysteria. In fact, this is an SOS signal!

How to avoid problems in the future?

To correct the situation, it is not enough just to find out what caused the riot. It is important to take steps to prevent it from happening again. And here, sometimes just “one fad” is not enough - you will have to reconsider a lot in the family structure, upbringing methods, behavior, etc. The tips below will help parents with this.

  • Spend as much time with your child as possible. And not just "close". Treat him as an equal and show your respect for his personality and needs. Connect to your adult affairs, let him decide what to do with you. So the baby will learn democratic behavior, the ability to find compromises. Play with him more often: in games, the child always feels in charge, so they strengthen his sense of self-worth in the family.
  • Do not be afraid to express your love for the baby: words, hugs, care, attention. It is very important for him to feel significant, loved, good for you. The child needs this for a full mental and physical development. Do not think that this is how you raise a sissy. On the contrary: a self-confident, self-sufficient, caring, balanced person.
  • Think carefully about the atmosphere surrounding the child. Constant conflicts, aggression, scenes of cruelty (not even in your family, but somewhere in the yard) - all this can unsettle the baby. Especially if he has an unstable nervous system and he is very impressionable. Change the situation if possible.
  • Show your child equality. From time to time, change roles with the baby: play in the family, but take on the role of a child, and give him the role of an adult. What will happen? The baby will show you your behavior towards him: your manner of upbringing, intonation, system of prohibitions, etc. A very useful activity for an adult is to see yourself through the eyes of your own child.
  • Develop a unified system of prohibitions in the family: what dad does not allow, neither mom nor grandmother will allow. This will not give the child room for "psychological experiments." At the same time, the prohibitions should have an understandable causal relationship for the crumbs (this cannot be done, because you will hurt yourself), which does not confirm your totalitarian authority (I said no!), but gives the child an idea of ​​​​the framework of reasonable and safe. In addition, it is always important that the ban has an alternative: this is impossible, but something is possible. The child must feel that his opinion is taken into account, he is given freedom of choice.

The most important remedy for many children's troubles is mutual understanding with parents. If a trusting relationship can be built, calming down the baby will not be a problem, and he will not have to be capricious. After all, there is nothing to achieve. He is already loved, understood, appreciated, supported, listened to his desires, respected as a person - with his needs and difficulties.

Democratic relations, the ability to build a constructive dialogue with a child and find a compromise is not an easy science. But it gives the child the main feelings in his life. He is needed. His opinion is important. He is good. Does it make sense for such a child to hysteria endlessly?

Children can get into a state of psychological arousal, so all parents should know how to calm a child during a tantrum. During such periods, babies lose their self-control, begin to scream, cry, bite, fight in mental fits. Adults need to determine the causes of such an excited state, and know how to neutralize it.

The parent cannot always satisfy the desires of the child when he already begins to understand the world, attract attention, and also annoy adults. There are several reasons for such a nervous state:


It is important to understand how to calm the baby when he has such attacks. If you react incorrectly to such moments, then the child throws tantrums every day for a long time.

How to understand a child who is not yet able to speak?

All novice parents regret that the instruction in the manufacturer's language is not attached to the newborn.

In fact, crying is a kind of language of communication between the baby and the world, because it can be very diverse. Over time, each parent begins to distinguish the intonations with which the baby tries to convey information about what is bothering him. But even if this is a problem, the very presence of crying already says a lot.

At breastfeeding The baby always responds well to feeding if everything is in order. If he cries and refuses to eat, something definitely hurts him. Maybe it's stomach cramps.

If the cry slowly increases from quiet to loud and demanding, the baby is probably hungry. And if mom also disappeared somewhere, then crying takes on intonations of resentment and despair.

If the crying is not too active, but restless, this usually indicates discomfort. You may need a diaper change. In fact, a baby can scream without a good reason, simply because he is bored, but then it’s not crying, but a cry, usually intermittent and loud, like a call to pay attention to him.

Over time, the little one learns to let his parents know what he needs, so in a few months any mother will become an expert in the types of children's screams, cries that express the whole gamut of human feelings and will know exactly how to calm a newborn baby during a tantrum..

well and one year old baby is already on the threshold of learning the language of the parents.

How is hysteria different from whims

It is important to understand the difference between an excited state and children's whims. In the latter case, the baby is trying to get the forbidden or desired. This leads to the fact that he starts screaming, stomping his feet. That is, he deliberately annoys parents.

But hysteria is involuntary behavior. Children are not able to control their emotions and physical manifestations. There may be convulsions that need to be urgently stopped.

Stages of nervous excitement

Experts note three stages of seizures. It is important to note that ignoring the child can lead to the termination of the excited state.


It should be noted that the causes and condition of the child during a tantrum may differ, it all depends on the type of nervous system.

Hysteria at 2 years of age

Since the baby's emotional system is still underdeveloped, hysterical behavior is the norm, experts say. At this age, the little one already understands the meaning of the words “no”, “no”, “I don’t want to”. With hysterics, he expresses his dissatisfaction with the rules or requests of his parents.

Some parents fulfill all the requirements of the child to calm him down, others ignore, and still others use physical force. To avoid negative consequences, you need to know which reaction is correct.

If it was not possible to stop the attack at the initial stage, you should not scold the baby, and even more so beat, as this will lead to greater excitement. With regular concessions, the little one will quickly learn that adults will always comply with his demands if he starts crying, and will use such methods on a regular basis.

But hitting children in such a state is also impossible. The best option is ignoring hysterical behavior. The child will understand that his cries and crying do not lead to the desired effect.

During such periods, it is best to hug the baby, say a few gentle words. It is necessary to make him understand that it is impossible and impossible to manipulate adults.

In public places, children try to attract strangers with their behavior so that mom and dad make concessions to him. But it is not recommended to succumb to provocations, otherwise he will always demand to buy the thing he likes. You should not pay attention to the sidelong glances of outsiders who may condemn you and your baby's behavior.

It is enough to wait a little while the little one calms down, after which, calmly talk to him, be sure to find out the cause of the tantrum. This reaction allows desired result.

Nervous state at 3 years of age

At this age, the child's nervous behavior is pronounced. He begins to understand the world around him and learns to express his stubbornness. Experts note that during this period, the baby begins a crisis, and behavior can change every few hours.

The child is trying to anger adults and get away from all compromises. He wants to show his independence. This behavior takes new parents by surprise.

Psychologists say that you do not need to scold the baby so as not to focus his attention on bad moments. The best thing to do is switch his attention. But at the peak of hysterical behavior, this approach is ineffective, since the children's emotions are no longer controlled.

At home, it is recommended to endure screams for a while until the baby calms down, then talk to him, find out the reasons for this behavior. In public places, it is better to take him to where there are fewer people. This will lead to the fact that a small person will be less likely to experience nervous excitement.

Hysteria at 4 years of age

If children continue to scream and cry regularly, then parents should be wary, as this may be the result of improper upbringing. This is how spoiled children often behave - they can be distinguished by the tantrums that accompany any refusal and prohibition. For example, you told your son or daughter that it's time to turn off the cartoons. well-bred child at this age, he will protest with words, try to negotiate, and the hysterical will immediately burst into tears, beating furniture and walls, screaming. He must understand what is allowed and what is forbidden, otherwise he will achieve what he wants with tears.

Psychologists note that it is required to consult a specialist, with pronounced symptoms:

  • frequent bouts of arousal at the psychological level;
  • aggressiveness;
  • intermittent breathing;
  • loss of consciousness;
  • begins to cause physical damage to people around;
  • older children are susceptible to hysterics;
  • the appearance of nightmares;
  • chronic fatigue and lethargy;

Neurologists, psychologists will help to cope with such a disease and establish family relationships. To avoid such consequences, it is necessary to take seriously the upbringing of the baby from a young age.

How to calm a child

Initially, adults must decide on the cause, which depends on many factors. During an attack, certain measures must be taken.


The main way out of the situation is the correct response to mental arousal. If seizures do not go away long time then you should definitely seek medical attention.

Parents share experiences

Violet

“We had problems in the family when our second daughter was born. The eldest daughter was two years old, and I have huge to-do lists, plus a nursing baby in my arms. At first she was interested, but then she began to get nervous and throw tantrums over trifles, sometimes for no reason at all. I didn’t even think that such small children could be jealous. I had to take immediate action. For example, I feed the younger one, while I plant the older one nearby. I started talking to her actively, explaining that the baby is very small, she needs our help. As a result, she received an assistant in the face of her eldest daughter, who will give a diaper and a towel, and informs when the baby wakes up. I try to tell the eldest more often how she helps me, my daughter immediately blooms and calms down.

Mom Elena

“I have a problem with dressing. Now my son is in his second year, but we do not like to dress from birth. I tried to stop to play and then continue to dress - it only gets worse. Now I try to do everything quickly, through “I don’t want to”, and then go out into the street. And already there, either he himself is distracted, or I occupy him with something.

Adele

“My daughter is 3.5 years old. One day she woke up in the middle of the night in hysterics. Apparently something had a dream, but at first I was afraid that something hurt her. She sobbed terribly. I rushed to feel sorry for her, to reassure her, I understand that the child is hysterical, but I don’t know what to do. She took me to bed. Then she barely returned. She liked being with me, and as soon as I start to shift it, tears begin. And so for two weeks I struggled with her desire to sleep with me. I sat near her bed and explained that the children should sleep separately, that I love her and do not leave her.

Victoria Fedorova, child psychologist, shares tips on how to deal with whims and tantrums, and how to comfort a baby when it hurts.

First of all, parents should understand that tantrums are an integral part of growing up a little person, no matter how hard you try, they cannot be completely avoided. If a child is hysterical, there is no need to make a tragedy out of this: an excess of emotions is simply obliged to find a way out.

A whim is a desire to get what adults do not consider it necessary to give him.From the point of view of the parent, the subject of the conflict can be harmful, unnecessary, dangerous, distracting, uncomfortable, untimely, and the like.

But you need to understand that if today you forbade your son or daughter some trifle, and then after screaming and crying you allowed it, then you will continue to receive the same thing incrementally. Only next time he may need something really impossible, and the conflict that you get will, like circles on the water, become more and more. The logic that the child argues will suggest that since you still have not agreed, it means that he is not yet loudly and actively crying and rolling on the floor.Therefore, all parents should remember that the main thing in their behavior is the sequence of actions.

As Dr. Komarovsky said: "If something is impossible today, then it is impossible tomorrow, and with mom, and dad, and grandma."It is important to have a dialogue with children, to discuss what is possible, what is not and why, to explain their actions.Maybe we should not ban something that is not important for adults, but the structure of the bans should be transparent and understandable. When he is clearly aware that whims will not bring the desired result, then he will not start.

When a child is in pain, there is no time for an educational moment. All measures must be taken to pain to a minimum, and then tightly engage in his consciousness.

If the pain is not too long-term, for example, the little one scratched his knee, and you treated the wound, take pity on the baby, let him know that you love him very much. Talk a lot and interestingly, because this is how you divert his attention, and he stops listening to sensations. It would be nice to find an interesting joint activity, in order to be distracted, if possible, you need to fill in the visual range of the child: read a picture book, you can draw, play quiet games, cartoons are also suitable, many children love music. Do something with him that interests him. This is the case when you need to show maximum attention and participation.

If the child is worried about long-term pain, then the same thing should be done, but alternately (if the causes of pain cannot be temporarily eliminated). The presence and participation of loved ones is very important for babies at any age.

Babies also suffer from pain, such as abdominal cramps. Usually during this period, the baby is carried in their arms and warmed with living warmth, pumped, worn in slings.

Prevention

Absolutely all parents face nervous attacks of their children. To avoid negative consequences, you need to know how to stop a tantrum in a child and take preventive measures.


This is a difficult task for all parents. The main thing is to keep calm. If the psyche can no longer stand it, then you need to take a deep breath, and go out for a few minutes in order to lose the baby from sight. After an attack, you need to behave naturally, and not show him that he behaved badly. After a couple of weeks of such preventive measures, the attacks should be reduced.

If nothing helps to achieve a positive effect, then it is recommended to contact the clinic, where they will conduct a professional examination, thanks to which, specialists will determine the cause and help solve problems. Sometimes medication is required.

Folk remedies

It is important to note that only a doctor can prescribe treatment, but he may recommend taking natural sedatives. They are herbal based. Fees help to deal with the problem for a while. In addition, such methods are recommended by specialists for children with agitated nervous system. The prepared products are light, so they will not harm the health of the baby.

It is recommended to consult a medical professional as children may have allergic reactions to certain herbs. Also, certain fees are contraindicated in certain diseases. This must be taken into account and not self-medicate. Below you can find recipes for remedies that are given as examples. The necessary herbs are sold at any pharmacy kiosk.

  • Herbal tea for young children. It is necessary to make a collection of wheatgrass, marshmallow, chamomile and licorice, fennel in the ratio: 2:1:2:2:1. Pour 2 tablespoons of the collection with 1 cup of boiling water, then boil over high heat for about 20 minutes. The infusion must be filtered. Take the remedy in a warm form, three times a day before meals. The duration of the course is about 3 weeks. The product can be used at the age of more than 1 year, without allergies to herbs.
  • In the same dosage, motherwort infusion is allowed.
  • If the infant begins to behave irritably, then it should be bathed in a bath with the addition of coniferous extract. The course of therapy lasts 3 weeks.
  • Without the appointment of a pediatrician and other doctors, it is allowed to take homeopathic preparations or which include the amino acids of glycine.
  • As prescribed by the doctor, it is recommended to give the baby vitamin complexes, the dose of which must be strictly observed. Otherwise, it can lead to hypervitaminosis. Its consequences also negatively affect the condition of the baby.

It is important to understand that when taking any medicinal and natural remedies, it is required to observe the duration of the course. Stronger funds should not be given to the child on their own, otherwise it can lead to serious consequences.

Hysteria in a child is normal, but with frequent attacks, you need to be alert. The reason may be improper upbringing of children, violation of the daily routine, as well as some diseases. If you can’t deal with such a problem on your own, you don’t need to let it take its course. It is necessary to immediately contact a children's specialist who will help establish family relationships.

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Children's tears cause different feelings in parents - from pity and sympathy to irritation and helplessness.

website tells how to calm the baby in different situations, while maintaining your own calmness.

Children's tears can be caused by various reasons: the child was hurt, he was offended, he was frightened or demands to immediately buy him a toy. In each situation, choose the appropriate method, but remember: you can’t dismiss the child’s feelings, and hugs are necessary.

1. Switch attention

You can distract the attention of a crying child different ways, most importantly, captivate him interesting topic so that he forgets about tears.

  • Keep an interesting item in your pocket or bag, which the child has never seen before: a new fun pen or small toy that can "talk" to crying baby- comfort him or tell a story.
  • Ask a tough question, which requires the attention of the child and his interaction with an adult: “Wow, what is this unusual car driving down the street? Can you help me identify what brand this is?

2. Create a ritual

If crying is not caused by some serious reason, but by whims or unwillingness to do something, you can come up with a funny ritual to get rid of tears, for example, turn on a hairdryer that will "dry tears" or "blow away whims", or to give bad mood cure"- a delicacy that the child loves and which is not available just like that.

3. Speak your feelings

When a child cries, he experiences genuine emotions that are no different in strength from ours. When we say “stop acting up” or “nothing to cry over trifles,” we refuse to notice the feelings of the child and leave him alone with his experiences.

Instead, try to help your baby understand what he is experiencing. Turn to face him, sit down next to him, hug or pick up and explain his feelings. Julia Gippenreiter in her book "Communicate with a child. How?" gives the following dialogue as an example:

Son: "He took my car!"

Dad: "You are very upset and angry with him."

This is how you show that you have tuned in to the emotional wave of the child, hear and accept his grief.

4. Stop crying with hugs

If the child does not hear the words and falls into a tantrum, and even in a public place, it is difficult to remain calm. But it needs to be done. Do not yell at the child, do not demand to calm down - this will lead nowhere. Instead, you need to take a few simple steps:

  • Hold your child tightly.
  • Do not ask questions, as words put extra stress on a child's brain, which is already overloaded. It's better to just be quiet.
  • Breathe deeply and evenly.
  • Rock and stroke your baby in time with your breath.
  • Let me cry.
  • After a while, begin to quietly say comforting words.
  • Wash the child, give him a drink.
  • Discuss the situation only when the child calms down.

How to prevent whims

Sometimes tears and tantrums can be prevented simply by not doing what causes them and by setting simple rules communication with the child.

  • Follow the routine of the day. Often the trigger for children's tears is overwork, hunger or overexcitation from too active, long and loud games. Make sure that the child eats, drinks, sleeps, walks and communicates on time and in moderation.
  • Don't ban everything. Let the child clearly know what not to do: cross the road alone, touch hot plate etc. If a child cries in response to prohibitions, hug him and help him survive the “tears of futility” from the fact that not everything is possible for him. Allow the rest.
  • Let's choose. Instead of forcing your child to do something they don't want to do, offer an alternative. For example, if he refuses to clean up toys, you can ask: “Which song will we clean up to - about the elephant or about the Christmas tree?”
  • Turn a boring activity into a game. Instead of washing your hands, you can "bath the car", and while brushing your teeth, "talk" with germs that are unhappy with toothpaste.
  • Don't say no. Replace the abrupt rejection with other words: "maybe", "we'll see", "a little later", "provided that ..."
  • Wait a couple of minutes. If the child refuses to do something, do not insist and repeat the request after a while in other words.