Whitney Thor is pregnant. Dancing BBW: How Whitney Way Thor fights discrimination against obese people. About No Body ShameCampaign
She had no intention of becoming the mouthpiece of the body positivity movement. Two years ago, her cherished goal was to get rid of hundreds of kilograms in order to bring her figure in line with the standards. In fact, until the age of 18, Whitney was a slender girl and loved to dance. But in her first year of college, something strange happened: she suddenly began to rapidly gain weight and gained 45 kg in a year.
She abandoned dancing, fell into depression and recovered even more - up to 140 kg. A couple of years later, doctors found the reason for such a drastic change - the girl was diagnosed with polycystic ovaries. The desire to lose weight has become an obsession for Whitney. She graduated as a zumba (dance fitness) instructor, started working at a local North Carolina state radio station, and struggled with the weight she hated…until she posted the “Dancing BBW” video on Youtube. This act radically changed her future.
Whitney Thor tells Psychologies how she managed to not only step over stereotypes, but also begin to destroy them.
Psychologies: How did you feel when you suddenly went from a skinny dancer to a very fat woman?
Whitney Thor: For a long time I could not understand what was wrong with me. I remember how I touched doorposts, furniture and I had terrible bruises and abrasions on my body: my body increased in volume so quickly that I simply did not realize myself in space. And you know, this is a great metaphor, reflecting the fact that I did not understand my place in society, it seemed to me that with every pound I gained, I was losing my value.
I could not come to terms with the new perception of myself, I seemed to myself lazy, disgusting. And in the end, she just stopped living. Although, if you remember ... After all, I was ashamed of my body even when I was slim. I was ridiculed for not being thin enough, which resulted in my bulimia. This shows how cruel people in our society are to women when it comes to their bodies.
And then you found out about your diagnosis. How did he influence your life?
Polycystic ovaries is an endocrine disorder, quite common: in America, it is detected in every tenth woman. This syndrome has a number of symptoms, you may or may not have some of them. Among the symptoms that I have had to deal with is insulin resistance, which leads to sudden and drastic weight gain and an inability to lose it.
In addition, my menstrual cycle is disturbed, and the chances of getting pregnant have been minimized so far. I also have too high testosterone levels for a woman, which leads to increased facial hair growth, and on the other hand, to rapid baldness. Here are just a few of the problems I have to contend with.
Why I'm ashamed of my body: it's not my fault that I got sick and put on weight
This hormonal imbalance is associated with mood swings and chronic fatigue. I feel like I never get a good rest. But even more dangerous is that this violation is fraught with the risk of heart disease, diabetes and depression. And therefore, in order to avoid many health problems in the future, it is very important that I actually lose some weight.
And that's why you decided to start dancing again?
I returned to dancing in 2011 and lost 45 kg in 8 months. And then I gained the same weight again, and that's when I thought. Why am I ashamed of my body? It's not my fault that I got sick and put on weight. I eat less than my peers and spend hours on the dance floor - yes, I'm fat, but why should this prevent me from living a full life? I realized that I don't want to give up my life again, that I need to keep dancing because it makes me really happy. It was then that I decided to take dancing seriously and posted a video on the Internet that changed my life.
How did the idea for this video come about?
I did a program on our local radio, where for the first time I decided to speak out loud, publicly about my weight and my feelings associated with it. And along with that, I started blogging, where I shared my feelings about stereotypes and prejudice against fat people. And they wrote to me in the comments: “Tell me more about your campaign.” And I had the most ordinary blog!
I was faced with a choice: do I want to start an official campaign, and I decided that my answer is yes! This is how the project "Don't be ashamed of your body" was born. This is a campaign whose task is to help men and women live without the burden of shame. Because I knew from my own experience that shame is exhausting, paralyzing. I lost ten years of my life because of him. And I don't want anyone else to underestimate themselves for as long as I have all these years.
I wanted to create an image of a happy and accomplished person with a lot of weight
I started recording my dance videos and posting them on Youtube under the heading "Dancing BBW" and it had a liberating effect. I received a lot of positive feedback and began to understand what an important role I took on - I became the voice of those fat women who are still embarrassed by their body.
I wanted to create an image of a happy and fulfilled person with a lot of weight, yes - and such a positive image is not often seen in the media. After all, our stereotype of perception of a fat person is too stable - he is either a comic character, or an object of ridicule, or a participant in the next "weight loss" TV show. So my blog and my participation in the TLC program "My full life”, I think breaks this stereotype and shows that there is something else in me besides a lot of weight.
Your first dance video has over 7 million views in a year. Didn't expect such an effect?
It's just a fairy tale. It is a pity that we released it too raw, unfinished. When it became popular, I thought: oh shit, if I knew, I would make it better. But on the other hand, it's still good that it turned out so funny, natural. In general, the most important events in life happen when you least expect them.
My life changed when I stopped feeling like a victim
During this year I heard the opinion of so many people. And it is curious that there were no less responses from women with anorexia than from fat women. Men write, older people and young people write from all over the world, with a variety of problems. Literally every day I get these responses and I feel like I'm helping people. When I was younger and weighed 58 kg, I could only dream of becoming such a famous dancer. And I don't think it could have happened to me when I was thin.
It's funny, of course, in what a funny way life has found a way to fulfill my dreams. I think everything in my life changed the moment I stopped feeling like a victim and decided to take my life into my own hands. And this video is a perfect presentation of that moment.
What difficulties do you have to overcome?
There were and still are many. I had to seriously rewire my brain to understand: I am a worthy person, and I have the same right to be healthy and happy as any other person on this planet. And not just to understand, but to believe in it for real. But there were, of course, purely practical difficulties that did not disappear anywhere, because I never weighed as much as I do now.
In everyday life, I have to deal with problems that you never even thought about, like when you need to fasten your seat belt, or fit in a chair, or reach for the back of my legs to shave them before a date. These are moments that cause a strong sense of embarrassment, but this is my choice, my decision: to be as open and honest with the audience as possible.
Who supported you in the fight against depression?
A couple of close friends and, of course, my family. I have wonderful parents, but their attitude to what is happening has changed over time. At first they encouraged me to lose weight because they thought it would solve all my problems and make me happy. And when I told my parents that losing 90 kg no longer interests me, it doesn’t seem like the most important issue in my life, they didn't like it at all.
It wasn't until my videos started gaining popularity and they saw the impact I could have on people that they started to really understand my point of view and support me even more. It was one of the most significant moments in my life. Because before, when I complained to my father about ridicule and humiliation, he used to say: “Whitney, you know that society does not like fat people, and you cannot change society, but you can change yourself.”
And a few days ago he came to me and said: “You know, Whitney, I changed my mind. I think you can actually change the world." And it's unbelievable that my parents took such a fresh look at the whole situation.
How has this story changed your attitude to the world, to yourself?
Has changed a lot. If I had not gained weight, I would still rely only on appearance. But when she lost her value in the eyes of others, I had to look deeper into myself and understand what I really have to offer the world. From someone who was ashamed of myself for so long and felt so alienated, I have evolved into someone who makes everyone around me proud. I see that every time I appear in public, people want to communicate with me, tell stories about the problems in their lives.
Don't Focus on What Makes You Different
I began to empathize more with other people in a way that I had never been able to before. Because I was fairly wealthy and relatively attractive white girl and did not belong to any minorities. And when you become part of some socially excluded group, you unwittingly learn to identify with these people who are different from others, and as a result you understand them better.
How has your relationship with your body changed?
I don't think I've ever loved my body the way I do today. I'm not afraid to look at myself naked, and I think I'm beautiful. I learned to take better care of myself. I like to feel muscle fatigue after rehearsals, an active lifestyle makes me feel comfortable.
What is the worst thing about it is regular sleep, because I am a real night owl and do not like to go to bed at night. I also have strange eating habits - I can eat nothing all day before dinner and do not follow any strict dietary rules, which in my case is simply necessary.
What advice would you give to someone who doesn't love and is embarrassed about their body?
Try not to focus on what makes you different from others. Look inside yourself and focus on what makes you feel valuable. Remember that each of us has great potential, regardless of whether society appreciates us or not.
If you could meet anyone - living or dead, or even fictional - who would it be?
I would like to meet Michael Jackson because he is the greatest dancer in history!
The star of the reality show “My Complete Life” Whitney Way Thor posted a video, after which some fans began to praise her for losing weight. Women wrote that American weight loss inspires them. But Thor was not at all happy with such comments and scolded such fans. And opinions about whether she is right or not are divided.
Whitney Way Thor, 35, is best known for her role in the reality show My Big Fat Fabulous Life. The plot revolves around Thor herself, who showed that, having an impressive excess weight(the woman recovered up to 170 kilograms due to polycystic ovaries), you can not complex and enjoy life. The program also talked about losing weight, although this was not the main theme of the show. As Thor told Woman's Day, when launching the program, her main goal was "to bring to the TV screens of the whole world a plump woman who does not participate in a weight loss contest and is not the object of jokes."
For many viewers, the optimistic, open and bright Whitney has become a model of a body-positive woman. While participating in the filming, she also launched something like training for obese people - No Body Shame at Sea (in fact, this is a cruise trip with dance classes, yoga, and so on). And of course, the star actively publishes videos in instagram, where more than 600 thousand people subscribed to it.
Whitney often posts photos and videos of sports activities, and another appeared on the social network on July 24. A girl is dancing on it.
The video received a lot of positive comments - fans (but mostly fans) were happy that Whitney looks great on the frames. And some fans also felt that Thor had lost weight, and began to praise her for this and claim that Whitney inspires them.
Is it just me or have you lost weight? I love it ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Expand
You've lost a lot of weight! Good job, girl! You look great as always ❤️ Expand
Hey Whitney, I think your hard work is paying off, I can see a change in your appearance like you've lost weight. Keep going girl, it's just taking time. You are a huge source of inspiration to me, sending rays of love from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
ExpandApparently, the fans thought that their words about losing weight would please Whitney. But it was a mistake. The very next day, Thor posted a video in which she expressed dissatisfaction with such replays.
View this post on Instagram
According to Whitney, she does not aspire to be someone who inspires others to lose weight, and thanking fans for comments congratulating her on losing weight would be embarrassing for her.
I read the comments and most of them are people congratulating me on losing the weight you thought I had lost. But I assure you that I'm still fucking fat and that hasn't changed since day one [of the show]. I'm just not here to inspire anyone to lose weight. If you are inclined to get inspiration from me, I appreciate it and I notice you. But I'm just a multifaceted person who focuses on a lot of other things in life besides losing weight. So this [congratulations on weight loss] is not something I feel comfortable thanking you for.
Thor clarified: she is glad that she inspires her subscribers. However, the woman hopes that this inspiration is based on the fact that Whitney is a woman who has learned to love herself regardless of her size.
Many subscribers agreed with Whitney's words - in their opinion, it is much more important to be happy than to be slim.
If only I had learned this truth when I was 12 years old. Expand
I love it so much!! I was curious what you thought of those comments. You inspire me with your focus on body positivity!! I completely accepted my body and for that I have to thank you ❤️
ExpandSuch precise words! A happy and healthy body is as much about the inside as it is about the outside. I try to live and live like a big and beautiful woman with a smile on my face and sunshine in my soul. Keep being yourself. You are incredible, damn cool! Expand
But there were also those fans who objected to Thor and considered that who, if not her, should inspire women to lose weight.
This is congratulations on the extra years healthy life. As a man who lost 187 pounds (about 84 kilograms. - Approx. Medialeaks), I can congratulate you on the fact that you can sleep better, fit in booths easier, find cuter clothes, hear less insults, get more attention from men in general, more kindness from people. This is congratulations that you now have more energy and relief in physical activity. Expand
You should inspire others! You have so many people who are guided by you and you Strong woman so you are the best candidate [for inspiration] on the path to weight loss!!
there were even arguments why the girl's act was hypocritical.
For five days, we talk about people who feel deprived of their rights, and about ways to deal with this feeling. For this material, we recorded a monologue of a thirty-year-old American woman who is struggling with discrimination based on excess weight.
Whitney Way Thor was an ordinary girl, a high school student and a professional dancer. But at some point, Whitney was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome, one of the possible manifestations of which is severe obesity. She began to weigh more than a hundred kilograms. Dancing had to be abandoned, and the scene changed to a fitness club. For several years, Whitney tried to return to her original weight, but her body did not give in - she dropped twenty-five kilograms and gained back forty. At some point, the girl decided to forget about stereotypes and remember her love for dancing. Whitney has recorded several Fat Girl Dancing videos and started the No Body Shame Campaign blog. With his videos, Whitney makes you rethink the stereotype that fat means the presenter is not healthy lifestyle life.
About discrimination
In America, we love to talk about how tolerant we are of all genders, races, and sizes. But this is not true. Here, fat people live under constant pressure from society. This has always amazed me, because the Americans are one of the fattest nations in the world. But in fact, everyone here is obsessed with appearance, with the desire to lose weight, and the fat people are negatively treated, despite the fact that everyone in the family has at least one fat relative. When I began to gain weight dramatically, the whole situation was comparable to some kind of social experiment. You know, one of those when the hero is dressed as a fat man and offered to walk around the city and see how others will react. The guys who asked me out on dates just a couple of months ago walked by, did not look at me and generally pretended that I did not exist. It was crazy, because just recently we met.
In general, people became less friendly, often very rude. I remember the first time I thought that this is how minorities feel. In the clubs, all the guys began to behave disgusting: they came up and called me fat. Relations with girls have also changed. They immediately began to demonstrate that I was not one of them. I immediately became different - a fat girl. Some new acquaintance always assumed that she knew everything about me in advance: “Oh, did you ever have a boyfriend?” They decided that since I was fat, it meant I was insecure and I had never had a relationship. This annoyed me a lot. And yes, despite the fact that deep down I was not confident in myself, I always had the pride not to show it. One girl once asked me about mine at that time young man, with whom we were engaged: “I understand that you met when you were still thin?” - "No". Honestly, the young man was not handsome, but still it could not have occurred to anyone that a man would want to marry a fat woman.
I have traveled extensively in Asia and Europe. I lived in Korea for a while. There I encountered a completely different kind of discrimination. If in America all discrimination is hidden, sometimes you can’t even prove it, then in Korea everything was on the surface. I lived in Daegu for four years. And every day for all four years Passers-by on the street pointed fingers at me and laughed. When I got into a taxi, the driver usually asked me either about my weight, or about my favorite food, or simply grunted as a sign of greeting. I sometimes felt like I was in a zoo: wherever I went, people stopped, stared, pushed their buddies - hey, look quickly. It felt like they had never seen a fatter person than me in their lives. But I got used to it pretty quickly and sometimes I didn’t even notice.
I have two really unpleasant stories. Once I was going to work, and a young man of about thirty in a suit drove by. It would seem that we consider these decently dressed people to be well-mannered and educated people. So, a man in a suit, driving by, called me dirty and spat on me. Usually I hold back. But that day, something broke in me, and like a madman I ran after him, showering him with all the curses I knew. The second story happened in a bar. Some guy at the next table got into a verbal altercation with my Korean friends. As a result, the owner of the bar approached and asked him to leave the establishment. And I was so angry at this man that I gave him a furious look. He responded by calling me names in Korean. I knew that the reason for this was that I was a woman, a foreigner, and even fat. It doesn't give me any right to look him in the eyes. Then I began to go down the stairs, he flew up from behind and began to beat me on the head. It’s good that my friends were nearby, who immediately tied him up and took him to the police.
When I got into the taxi, the driver usually asked me either about my weight, or about my favorite food, or just grunted in greeting
But what has always been really painful for me to endure is the reaction of the children. Sometimes, walking past children playing on the street, I could wave my hand and say hello, and in response, screaming, they ran in different directions. Am I so disgusting that children are afraid of me like a monster? As for my students, there were no such problems with them. They quickly got used to me, and, it seems to me, I managed to change their consciousness a little. They came up and said, “Master, you are fat but so beautiful. I know why boys like you because you are smart and funny.”
Then I lived in Ireland for several years and traveled around Europe. To be honest, I was very worried at first. I thought that Europeans in general are much thinner, and Americans are standard fat. And it was very disappointing to be this stereotype - a fat American. But in fact, the attitude towards me was very relaxed. No one has ever told me anything about my weight. People told me that I was beautiful, strong, but not fat at all. It seems to me that in Ireland I felt most in harmony with my body.
About the No Body Shame campaign
Campaign
It all started when I was a radio producer. We started our YouTube page and wanted to get more subscribers. At that time I had a lot of dance videos and I decided to post one of them. I titled the video Fat Girl Dancing simply because such a title would likely get more attention. We posted my videos for a year. They were popular, but not that much. And then in January 2014 my friend Tod and I recorded another video and it bombed. I don't know how or why it happened, but in a couple of days Facebook alone had over a million views and over 500,000 people shared the video. Then they wrote to me from The Huffington Post, got a call from Good Morning America and Today Show. I suddenly became the center of everyone's attention. All this time, apart from the video, I kept a blog about my life called No Body Shame Campaign. I thought that with examples from my life I could help other people to be confident in themselves and love their bodies.
about fat women
I am an avid feminist. This word scares a lot of people, but I think feminism is important. Not only in the US, but especially in other countries where the attitude towards women is much less progressive. First of all, I never let anyone say bad things to me. And if this happens, then I immediately fight back. If I do not stand up for myself, then this person will never understand that this is not necessary. In general, I understand that people, perhaps, cannot be changed. On the other hand, it seems to me that men behave badly towards women because we rarely point out their mistakes to them. You should not be shy and be able to stand up for yourself if a man called you fat or grabbed your ass in a public place.
Sometimes, passing on the street past children playing, I could wave to them and say hello, and they answer ran away screaming in different directions
Now there are many campaigns in support of fat women. Their main idea is that big women can be beautiful and sexy. This includes fashion shoots, modeling business and so on. But this is not about me at all, this is not my niche. It seems to me that if you focus on how beautiful you are, even if you are fat, it still suggests that you are sitting in some kind of box of stereotypes. For me, something else is important - not that we can be as beautiful as thin women but the fact that I can live a full life without any limiting stereotypes around. All these girls want to say - maybe you are glad that you are fat and sexy at the same time, but you still continue to evaluate yourself solely by external signs. And this is not for me. Everything I do in life has nothing to do with my appearance. That is why I dance. I am not afraid of people who will say that I am not worthy to dance, simply because I do not look good.
Criticism
My personal social media messages are 99% positive. People write to me from all over the world and thank me for my blog and my videos. “I just watched your video, it changed my life.” I never thought that someone would say this to me, especially every day, a thousand times a day. But if you read the comments on YouTube or Facebook, you can find a lot of things. Someone writes nasty things - she's fat, she's disgusting, she should kill herself. And someone decides to be a little more smart and says - oh, well, at least she is happy, despite the fact that she is unwell. Many write that I am promoting the idea of obesity. I think that's the funniest thing you can say to me. 'Cause I'm a fat girl dancing and exercising in all my videos. I primarily promote a healthy lifestyle, but not obesity.
Somehow I first came to Los Angeles, went to a local popular fast food restaurant and took a picture with a burger. The reaction was mixed: “Are you kidding? How can you eat it? Look at you!" In America, fast food advertising is very popular, where models sexually devour rolls. I downloaded three of these photos, and put mine next to them. What is the difference? Why do I look disgusting with a burger and promote obesity, but burger-eating models are sexy? It says this: people believe that you can judge the health of a person simply by his appearance. I know for sure that "fat" does not equate to "unhealthy", just as "thin" does not equate to "healthy". I have a lot of thin friends with different problems - high blood pressure, high cholesterol, inability to walk more than three kilometers on foot. I now weigh fifty kilograms more than they do, and do not experience the same problems. Of course, health care is quite understandable. But here the thing is different: people look at me and immediately decide that I have health problems, that I am on some kind of pills that are paid from their tax collections. If you get so mad when you see me at McDonald's, why don't you get mad when you see skinny people there? Why do you consider it your right to comment on this? All visitors to McDonald's lead an unhealthy lifestyle, but you are only angry with me. And why not go to a thin person and ask: “Do you smoke? Are you protected? How often do you play sports?
Confidence
I often get asked this question: how did you become so self-confident? I hate this question because there is no definite answer to it. All my thirty years of my life, I faced various problems: I gained weight up to one hundred kilograms, then dropped to seventy-five, gained back to one hundred. I've been through a lot and I would love to have a simple answer. The only thing I can say is that you need to work on yourself.
We are taught that in order to achieve anything, you need self-confidence. Now, I don't believe it. If this were the case, few people would eventually dare to get up from the couch and do something. After I dropped twenty pounds and then gained back thirty-five, I said to myself: "Calm down, life does not end there." So I gradually realized that I absolutely do not care about my weight. And despite the fact that you have to deal with a huge amount of criticism, there is still more positive. The main thing is to force yourself to get out of your usual comfort zone and do something. And confidence will follow. After all, confidence is the product of your action.
Success and recognition came to Whitney when ... she gained excess weight. Now the 170 kg dancer and TV presenter is successfully losing weight and successfully teaches others about it. What is Whitney's secret?
Reasons for rapid weight gain
Once upon a time, Whitney Thor was a thin and petite girl. But one day she began to rapidly gain weight, and after the examination, the doctors diagnosed her with a hormonal failure. Since then, Whitney has tried hundreds of diets, been in therapy for 10 years and exercised intensively, but the arrows of the scales inexorably showed “plus”. The constant sidelong glances of passers-by and the heavy sighs of loved ones became simply unbearable, so Whitney worked abroad for a long time.
But one day Whitney told herself “stop”, why torture yourself, because life is so good. Since then, the girl has not ceased to enjoy life and, contrary to the forecasts of doctors, is gradually losing weight.
Rejoice in spite of everything
This is the motto that Whitney promotes among her fans. Loving yourself, enjoying every moment of life and doing everything with pleasure - these are the main postulates of Thor.
Somehow, the girl published a video of her dance on the network, and the next morning she woke up famous. Soon, one of the US TV channels became interested in the incendiary girl and in 2016 signed a contract with her to create the reality show “My Full Life”. In it, Whitney will struggle with his problem, and teach this to the same desperate "dumplings".
Eat, dance... lose weight
Losing extra pounds is easier when you love yourself and your full body, says Whitney. She travels with pleasure, hangs out with friends, likes to chat with her girlfriend over a slice of pizza and a cup of cappuccino, meets nice guys and dances incendiary dances for her own pleasure. Since the girl began to live with pleasure, the weight began to slowly melt.
Whitney does not deny herself her favorite food, she eats whatever she wants, but at the same time leads an active lifestyle, and burns those extra pounds in the dance hall. “Burn more calories than you consume,” Whitney advises. The girl herself adheres to her own principles of comfortable weight loss: she enjoys dancing, attending parties and walking for a long time. The girl advises her subscribers not to complex about her imperfect body, but to do whatever they want, then the extra weight will go away much faster.
Now Whitney dances a lot, shoots videos, creates her own mega-popular program, travels around the world, meets a new guy and provides support to overweight people. So why not take an example from her.