Introduction……………………………………………………………….………..…2

Chapter I. Theoretical foundations of the problem of communication in adolescence…………………………………………………………………..……...…5

1.1. The role of communication in human life………………………………..…….5

1.2. Psychological and pedagogical characteristics

adolescence………………………………………………….7

1.3. Features of communication with peers

in adolescence…………………………………………..…11

Chapter Conclusions I…………………………………………………..……………17

Chapter II. Experimental Study

gender characteristics of communication in adolescence………...………19

2.1. Description of the experimental group

and research methods……………………………………………....19

2.2. Analysis of the obtained results……………………………………20

Conclusion……………………………………………………………...………..29

List of used literature…………………………………….…….….31

Annex 1……………………………………………………………………….33

Appendix 2……………………………………………………………………….38

Appendix 3………………………………………………………………….....40

Introduction

As you know, the need for communication, in positive relationships with other people is one of the main human needs. The success of professional activity, activity in public life and, finally, the personal happiness of everyone often depend on how successful a person is in communication.

Adolescence is characterized by the most contrasting psycho-physiological, social changes, which together create a very controversial socio-psychological portrait of today's teenager. This is the time when the restructuring of attitudes towards the environment takes place, self-esteem is rapidly formed, often inadequate to the real possibilities of a teenager, criticality in assessments increases sharply with a clear lack of self-criticism.

From 12 to 15 years old, the leading activity of a teenager is intimate-personal communication. The teenager begins to take himself and his abilities more seriously; tries to find his niche among peers, often ignoring the opinions of parents and teachers. Communication in adolescence undergoes a significant qualitative change in comparison with communication junior schoolchildren. Communication with peers becomes a priority for a teenager.

Already at preschool age, children choose their partner for various kinds gender-specific activities: most often boys choose boys, and girls choose girls. When observing communication in classes, we identified two areas of communication among adolescents - "boys" and "girls".

Since boys rarely choose girls, and girls rarely choose boys, the status of a teenager in the system of personal relationships is determined on the basis of sympathy on the part of representatives of his sex. In other words, a boy has a favorable position in the class because he is liked by boys, and a girl because she is preferred by girls. But about how the ideas of boys and girls about each other affect the situation in the classroom.

Taking into account all of the above,relevance of this study is determined by the need to study gender characteristics interpersonal communication teenagers. Communication in adolescence is a significant stage in a person's life. The preparation of a teenager for life in society, for the fulfillment of social roles depends on it. In order to prevent conflicts in the classroom, it is necessary to know how both boys and girls view the situation in the classroom from different points of view.

object research is the communication of adolescents.

Subject research - gender characteristics of communication in adolescence.

Target research - to identify the characteristic gender features of communication in adolescence.

The goal is realized through a seriestasks :

analyze the role of communication in human life;

reveal physiological features adolescence;

explore psychological features teenagers;

to analyze the features of communication with peers in adolescence;

to identify the influence of gender representations on the status of a teenager in a group.

theoretical basis For our study, the works of Vygotsky L. S., Elkonin D. B., Dragunov T. V., Kagan M. S., Feldstein D. I., Davydov V. V. served.

To achieve the goal, the followingmethods , as a test "Perception of a group by an individual" (Appendix 1), a sociometry technique (Appendix 2), a method for diagnosing the socio-psychological climate in a team (Appendix 3).

Experimental base : MOU "Afanasovskaya secondary school of the Korochansky district of the Belgorod region", students of the 9th grade, 13 people, including 7 girls and 6 boys.

The results of the study will improve relations in a group of teenagers.

The work consists of an introduction, two chapters, a conclusion, a list of references and applications.

In the first chapter "Theoretical foundations of the problem of communication in adolescence" the role of communication in human ontogenesis is considered, the physiological and psychological-pedagogical characteristics of adolescence are studied, the main features of adolescent communication are studied.

The second chapter "Experimental study of the characteristics of communication in adolescence" is directly research. It analyzes the features of interpersonal communication of boys and girls using the above methods.

In conclusion, the main results of the study are summarized.

Chapter I . Theoretical foundations of the problem of communication in adolescence

1.1. The role of communication in human life

The Great Psychological Encyclopedia gives the following concept of communication.

“Communication is a complex multifaceted process of establishing and developing contacts between people (interpersonal communication) and groups (intergroup communication), generated by the needs of joint activities and including at least three different processes:

Communication (exchange of information);

Interaction (exchange of actions);

Social perception (perception and understanding of a partner).

A person has an independent need for communication, not reducible to other needs (for food, warmth, security, impressions, activity, etc.), a need for knowledge of oneself and other people, i.e., for evaluation and self-esteem. By 2.5 months, children can state the formation of a need for communication.

The great importance of interpersonal communication is explained by the most important functions thatit performs with all forms of human activity.

First, in communication, information is exchanged between people.

Further, communication performs the so-called regulatory-communicative function. In communication, rules of behavior, goals, means, motives of behavior are developed, its norms are assimilated, actions are evaluated, a kind of hierarchy of values, a scale of human socialization is formed. It is not surprising that it is in communication that a person learns and experiences his significance. Therefore, its right direction becomes a source, one of the most important ways formation of the human personality.

Finally, communication regulates the level of emotional tension, creates a psychological relaxation and, ultimately, forms the emotional background on which our activities are carried out, and which to a large extent determines the very perception of the world. This function of communication in social psychology is called affective-communicative. In real communication, all its functions organically merge, regardless of its form. Even in a separate act of communication, all of them are often present.

Man is a social being, therefore, he can manifest himself only in society - in the process of communication. As a result, society influences the individual. A person in society behaves in a certain way, while showing some qualities and personality traits. The presence of individual qualities and properties that distinguish this particular person from others is closely related to the process of isolation in society.

Communication is one of the main psychological categories. A person becomes a person as a result of interaction and communication with other people. Communication is a complex multifaceted process of establishing and developing contacts between people, generated by the need for joint activities and including the exchange of information, the development of a strategy for interaction, perception and understanding of a communication partner.

Entering various communities, a person acts in them both as a subject and as an object of communication. That is, in the process of communication, he experiences the influence of others and, in turn, has a certain impact on them in the process of communicative interaction.

Therefore, communication is one of critical factors the emergence, development and strengthening of cognitive interests in a growing person. This is especially true when it comes to interacting with peers.3 ].

1. . Psychological and pedagogical characteristics of adolescence

Adolescence is the period of development of children from 11-12 to 15-16 years. Adolescence is also called the transitional age, because it is characterized by a gradual transition from childhood to adulthood. By level and character mental development adolescence is a typical age of childhood. On the other hand, a teenager is a growing person, standing on the threshold of adulthood.

The achieved level of development, the increased opportunities of a teenager cause him a need for independence, self-affirmation, recognition by adults of his rights and potentialities. Adults, emphasizing that a teenager is no longer a small child, and making increased demands on him, often continue to deny him the right to independence, the opportunities for self-assertion. Such a dual contradictory position of a teenager is fraught with various complications in interpersonal relations, which result in conflicts and take various forms of protest. Therefore, adolescence is sometimes called "difficult", "critical".

specific moments physical development are:

Growth in length;

weight gain;

Enlargement of the circumference of the chest;

The appearance of secondary sexual characteristics (pubertal growth spurt).

The increase in muscle mass and muscle strength is most intense at the end of puberty. The development of muscles in boys occurs according to the male type, and soft tissues in girls - according to female type; this gives the representatives of each sex, respectively, the traits of masculinity or femininity. Due to this, the appearance of a teenager changes in comparison with the appearance of a child, the general proportions of the body approach the proportions characteristic of an adult.

However, the restructuring of the motor apparatus is accompanied by a loss of harmony in movements, an inability to control one's own body appears (an abundance of movements, their insufficient coordination, general awkwardness, angularity). Along with the disproportionate growth of body parts, this can give rise to uncertainty, unpleasant experiences, sometimes taking pathological forms.

Age discrepancy in development of cardio-vascular system(delay in the development of blood vessels from the growth of the heart) often leads to temporary circulatory disorders, increased blood pressure. The consequence of this is dizziness, palpitations, headaches, fatigue, etc.

Features of the development of the cardiovascular system and the beginning of intense activity of the endocrine glands lead to some temporary disturbances in the activity of the nervous system of a teenager. He may experience increased excitability, irritability, irascibility, which are sometimes expressed in a tendency to violent and sharp reactions such as affects. Nervous system a teenager is not always able to withstand strong and long-acting monotonous stimuli and under their influence often goes into a state of inhibition or, conversely, into a state of strong excitement.

L. S. Vygotsky says that everyone agrees that this age is called the age of puberty. But at the same time, this is the age of maturation of personality and worldview.

The central and specific neoplasm is the emergence in a teenager of the idea that he is no longer a child (a sense of adulthood); the effective side of this idea is manifested in the desire to be and be considered an adult. This new formation of self-consciousness is a core feature of the personality, its structural center, since it expresses a new life position of a teenager in relation to people and the world, determines the specific direction and content of his social activity, a system of new aspirations, experiences and emotional reactions.

The specific social activity of a teenager lies in a great susceptibility to learning the norms, values ​​and behaviors that exist in the world of adults and in their relationships. This has far-reaching consequences because adults and children represent two different groups and have different responsibilities, rights and privileges.

The emergence of a teenager's idea of ​​himself as a person who has already crossed the boundaries of childhood determines his reorientation from one norms and values ​​to others - from children to adults.

Moral development in adolescence is characterized by the formation of moral convictions, which the teenager begins to be guided in his behavior and which are formed under the influence of the environment (family, comrades, etc.), in the process of educational work. In close connection with the formation of beliefs and worldview, the moral ideals of adolescents are formed.

One of highlights in the development of the personality of adolescents is the formation of self-awareness, self-esteem, the emergence of needs for self-education. In the development of a teenager's knowledge of the surrounding reality, there comes a period when a person, his inner world, becomes the object of a relatively deep study.

In connection with the development of self-awareness, high school students have a desire for trust in interaction with other people. Confidence becomes a quality of communication with adults, and "confession" - with peers, which primarily involves deep self-disclosure. Trust in a peer is realized in the sphere of intimate-personal communication, the main goal of which is understanding and self-disclosure. In confidential communication with adults, the situation changes somewhat, it becomes important not only to know one’s “today”, “real self”, but also to know oneself from the point of view of personal life prospects, one’s “desired”, “future self”.

According to Levin's theory, the most important processes of adolescence are the expansion of the life world of the individual, the circle of his communication, group affiliation and the type of people on whom he focuses. The adolescent's behavior is determined by the intermediateness (marginality) of his position. This manifests itself in the psyche, which is characterized by internal shyness, uncertainty about the level of claims, internal contradictions, aggressiveness, a tendency to extreme points of view and positions. The conflict is the greater, the sharper the differences between the world of childhood and the world of adulthood.

The teenage crisis marks the second psychological birth of a child. A teenager experiences this conflict as a fear of losing the “I”, as a dilemma: to be yourself with your own special and separate spiritual world and individual abilities, or to be together with those who are dear and appreciated.

Also in the peculiarities of thinking lies teenage negativism. Hence the "defensive reaction" of the teenager against the "encroachment" of adults on his independence.

Serious and versatile labor activity, the increased inquisitiveness of the mind requires a higher and more organized mental activity from the teenager. All this affects the nature of cognitive activity in adolescence. The adolescent becomes capable of a more complex analytical and synthetic perception of objects and phenomena.

Observation as a purposeful organized perception begins to occupy an increasing place in the mental activity of adolescents.

The content and logic of the subjects studied, the nature of the assimilation of knowledge form in a teenager the ability to independently think, reason, compare, draw relatively deep conclusions and generalizations. The ability to think abstractly develops. Adolescence is characterized by intensive development of arbitrary logical memory; the ability to logically process material for memorization increases. Attention becomes more organized, more and more its intentional character comes out.

Thus, adolescence is characterized by significant changes not only physically, but also psychologically. It is at this age that a teenager is realized as a person, ideas about himself and the world around him are formed, and communication with people is being restructured. Therefore, it is so important at this age not to limit the social circle of a teenager.

1. . Features of communication with peers in adolescence

It should be noted that when determining the leading type of activity in adolescence, there is no unequivocal opinion among psychologists. Some give the role of the leading activity to communication, which has an intimate-personal character. In this case, the subject of communication is another peer, and the content is the construction and maintenance of personal relationships with him. This point of view is shared by Elkonin D.B., Dragunova T.V., Kagan M.S. Others consider socially useful activities as the leading type of adolescent activity, during which further development of various forms of relationships with peers, with adults takes place and, according to D.I. Feldstein, new forms of communication are developed as the introduction of adolescents to society.

All researchers in the psychology of adolescence recognize the great importance for adolescents of communication with peers. Therefore, in adolescence, there is a reorientation of communication from parents, teachers and elders in general to peers.

A number of features are noted in the communication of adolescents. Adolescents, being constantly preoccupied with themselves and assuming that others share their concerns, usually act based on some imaginary or real audience.

The desire of a teenager to attract the attention of his comrades, to interest them and arouse sympathy can manifest itself in different ways: these can be demonstrations of their own qualities, both directly and by violating the requirements of adults, as well as clowning, antics, various entertaining actions, stories about all kinds of tales and tales.

I. S. Kon also says that one of the main trends of adolescence is the reorientation of communication from parents, teachers and elders in general to peers. In his opinion, such a reorientation can occur slowly and gradually or abruptly and violently, it is expressed in different ways in different areas of activity, in which the prestige of elders and peers is not the same, but it happens necessarily.

The need to communicate with peers, who cannot be replaced by parents, occurs in children very early and increases with age. Adolescents' behavior is inherently collective-group. Separate peer groups in adolescence become more stable, relationships between children begin to obey more stringent rules. The similarity of interests and problems that concern adolescents, the ability to openly discuss them without fear of being ridiculed and being on equal terms with comrades - this is what makes the atmosphere in such groups more attractive to children than adult communities.

Along with the direct interest in each other, which is typical for the communication of younger students, adolescents develop two other types of relationships that are poorly or almost not represented in the early periods of their development: comradely (beginning of adolescence) and friendly (end of adolescence). In older adolescence, children already have three different types relationships that differ from each other in the degree of closeness, content and the functions that they perform in life.

Success among peers in adolescence is most valued. In teenage associations, depending on the general level of development and upbringing, their own codes of honor are spontaneously formed. Of course, in general, norms and rules are borrowed from adult relationships. However, here it is closely controlled how everyone defends his honor, how relations are carried out from the point of view of equality and freedom of each. Loyalty, honesty are highly valued here and betrayal, treason, violation of the given word, selfishness, greed, etc. are punished.

In groups of adolescents, leadership relationships are usually established. Personal attention from a leader is especially valuable for a teenager who is not in the center of peer attention. He always especially cherishes personal friendship with the leader and, by all means, strives to win it. No less interesting for adolescents are close friends, for whom they themselves can act as equal partners or leaders.

Normativity in adolescent groups is formed spontaneously, control is carried out in small forms. If a teenager betrayed, let down, abandoned, he can be beaten, he can be boycotted and left alone. Adolescents harshly evaluate peers who, in their development, have not yet reached the level of self-esteem.

For all their orientation towards asserting themselves among their peers, adolescents are distinguished by extreme conformism in the adolescent group. One depends on everyone, strives for peers and is sometimes ready to do what the group is pushing him to do. The group creates a sense of "We" that supports the teenager and strengthens his inner position. Very often teenagers resort to autonomous group speech, to autonomous non-verbal signs to reinforce this "We"; at this age, teenagers begin to wear the same style and type of clothing to emphasize their involvement with each other.

For adolescence, finding a friend is of great importance. A friend in adolescence acquires special value. Communication according to the norms of the age status of adolescence is combined here with tender affection and adoration. Not only teenage girls express their feelings with hugs and aspirations to touch each other, this is also becoming characteristic of teenage boys. Along with friendly fights and fights, boys, just like girls, express their affection for each other through hugs and handshakes.

Similarity in interests and deeds is the most important factor in the friendly rapprochement of adolescents. Sometimes sympathy for a comrade, the desire to be friends with him are the reasons for the emergence of interest in the business that the comrade is engaged in. As a result, the teenager may develop new cognitive interests. A comrade becomes a role model for a teenager, he has a desire to become the same, to acquire the same personal qualities, values, skills and abilities. Friendship activates the communication of adolescents, they spend a lot of time talking on various topics. They discuss events in the life of their class, personal relationships, the actions of peers and adults, in the content of their conversation there are many different "secrets".

Later, towards the end of adolescence, there is a need for a close friend, there are special moral requirements for friendly relationships: mutual frankness, mutual understanding, responsiveness and sensitivity, the ability to keep a secret. “Kinship of souls” becomes with age an increasingly significant factor that determines the personal relationships of adolescents. Mastering moral standards is the most important personal acquisition of adolescence.

Teenage friendship, starting at 11, 12, 13 years old, gradually turns into a youthful one, already with other features of mutual identification. For the most part, traces of lofty relationships and joint striving for improvement remain in the soul of an adult for life.

The relationship between boys and girls is changing: they begin to show interest in each other as a representative of the opposite sex. In this regard, it becomes especially important for a teenager how others treat him. With this, first of all, one's own appearance is associated: to what extent the face, hairstyle, figure, manner of carrying oneself, etc. correspond to gender identification: “I am like a man”, “I am like a woman”. In the same connection, particular importance is attached to personal attractiveness - this is of paramount importance in the eyes of peers.

The emerging interest in the other sex in younger adolescents manifested itself at first in inadequate forms. So, boys are characterized by such forms of drawing attention to themselves as bullying, pestering, and even painful actions. Girls are usually aware of the reasons for such actions and are not seriously offended, in turn, demonstrating that they do not notice, ignore the boys. In general, boys also treat these manifestations of girls with intuitive attention.

Relationships get more complicated later on. Disappears immediacy in communication. Often this is expressed either in demonstrating an indifferent attitude towards the other sex, or in shyness when communicating. At the same time, the youths experience a sense of tension from a vague feeling of falling in love with members of the opposite sex.

There comes a stage when interest in the other sex is even more intensified, but outwardly, in the relationship between boys and girls, there is a great isolation. Against this background, there is an interest in establishing relationships, in who likes whom. In girls, this interest usually arises earlier than in boys: their own sympathies are mysteriously reported to a single friend, but often to a group of peers. Even with mutual sympathy, open friendships rarely appear, since for this adolescents need not only to overcome their own stiffness, but also to be ready to resist ridicule and teasing from their peers.

The interest of the child in peers of the opposite sex leads to an increase in the ability to single out and evaluate the experiences and actions of another, to the development of reflection and the ability to identify. The initial interest in the other, the desire to understand a peer give rise to the development of perception of people in general. The gradual increase in personal qualities and experiences allocated to others, the ability to evaluate them increase the ability to evaluate oneself.

Thus, communication acquires great value for a teenager, often pushing aside learning activities to the background. On the one hand, a teenager needs communication, joint activities, collective life, friendship, and on the other hand, he wants to be accepted, respected by his comrades. Interest in the opposite sex is increasing, but it manifests itself differently in both boys and girls. This is often expressed in shyness in communication, indifference, or in bullying. But communication with peers of both sexes plays an important role in the life of a teenager. At this time, social and gender roles are mastered, stereotypes of male or female behavior appear.

Chapter Conclusions I

Communication is one of the most important factors in the mental and social development of a child. Only in contact with an adult is it possible for a child to assimilate the socio-historical experience of mankind and realize the opportunity for him to become a representative of the human race.

Man is a social being, therefore, he can manifest himself only in society - in the process of communication. As a result, society influences the individual.

Adolescence is also called the transitional age, because it is characterized by a gradual transition from childhood to adulthood. In terms of the level and nature of mental development, adolescence is a typical era of childhood. On the other hand, a teenager is a growing person, standing on the threshold of adulthood.

Adolescence is one of the main periods of growth and formation of the body; at this time, the activity of all organs and systems is being restructured.

A number of features are noted in the communication of adolescents. The desire of a teenager to attract the attention of his comrades, to interest them and arouse sympathy can manifest itself in different ways: it can be a demonstration of one's own qualities, as a direct way.

Separate peer groups in adolescence become more stable, relationships between children begin to obey more stringent rules.

Success among peers in adolescence is most valued. In groups of adolescents, leadership relationships are usually established.For adolescence, finding a friend is of great importance.

The interest of the child in peers of the opposite sex leads to an increase in the ability to single out and evaluate the experiences and actions of another, to the development of reflection and the ability to identify.

Chapter II . Experimental study of gender characteristics of communication in adolescence

2.1. Description of the experimental group and research methods

The study involved 13 people of the 9th grade of the municipal educational institution "Afanasovskaya secondary school of the Korochansky district of the Belgorod region", of which 7 girls and 6 boys, the average age of the subjects was 14-15 years.

The study was conducted using the following methods:

Test "Perception of the group by the individual"

Methodology of sociometry

Methodology for diagnosing the socio-psychological climate of the team

The test "Perception of a group by an individual" allows you to determine the perception of an individual member of the team of the entire group, wherethe role of the group in the activity of the perceiver acts as an indicator of the type of perception.

In the method of sociometryeach member of the group must indicate his attitude towards other members of the group according to the selected criteria (in our case, leisure and study).

Diagnostics of the socio-psychological climate makes it possible to identify the internal processes taking place in the team, prevent conflicts, and ensure the formation of effective working and training groups.

After processing the results of the study, the following data were obtained:

type of perception of the team from the point of view of girls;

type of perception of the team from the point of view of boys;

class leader from the girls' point of view;

class leader from the boys' point of view;

assessment of the socio-psychological climate from the point of view of girls;

assessment of the socio-psychological climate from the point of view of boys.

A comparative analysis of the obtained data is given.

2.2. Analysis of the results

The first "type" of perception by an individual of a group is called "individualistic": when an individual is neutral towards the group, avoiding joint forms of activity and limiting contacts in communication. The second type of perception by an individual of a group is called “pragmatic”: when an individual evaluates a group in terms of usefulness and prefers contacts only with the most competent sources of information and those who are able to provide assistance. The third type of perception by an individual of a group is called "collectivistic": the individual perceives the group as an independent value, while there is an interest in the success of each member of the group and the desire to contribute to the life of the group.

The table below shows the results of the study using this method.

Table 2.1

The sum of the points scored on the test "Perception of a group by an individual" for each individual type of perception, taking into account the proposed key (Appendix 1).

Pragmatic

Collectivistic

As can be seen from the data presented, the majority of girls evaluate their class in terms of usefulness and prefer to maintain relationships with those classmates who can help them in different situations.

However, in terms of indicators, the collectivistic type of perception of the group is in second place. Girls are also interested in the results and success of their classmates.

The individualistic type of perception is undoubtedly present in this collective, but in much smaller numbers.

The boys' point of view is the same as the girls' point of view. They also perceive their team pragmatically. However, the individualistic type of perception is more typical for boys than for girls. Boys more often shy away from joint forms of activity and limit communication. The collectivistic type of perception is reflected much less than in girls.

This leads to the conclusion that both boys and girls are characterized by a pragmatic type of perception of the team. They form connections within the team according to the "usefulness" of a member of the team, his ability to help in different situations. However, girls tend to consider their team more friendly than boys. Girls are more sociable, rejoice at the success of classmates.

Sociometry was used to identify likes and dislikes within the team. Table 2.2 below reflects the sympathies of each member of this team.

Table 2.2

Preferences of each member of the team according to the method of "Sociometry"

Table 2.3 reflects the status of each team member in terms of the number of people who gave preference to him.

Table 2.3

The number of received preferences among boys and girls according to the method of "Sociometry"

Table 2.4 shows the relationship of the team to one of the members of its group. Each member of the team is evaluated from two sides: how many classmates gave preference to him when answering questions related to leisure (Who in class would you invite to your birthday party? Who in your class would you go on a multi-day camping trip with? Who would you like to be on a desert island with? ) or study (Who in the class would you like to sit at the same desk with? )

Table 2.4

The number of received preferences according to the method of "Sociometry"

After analyzing the data of the three tables, the following conclusions can be drawn:

more often girls choose girls, and boys choose boys;

girls choose boys more often than boys choose girls;

among boys, girls give the greatest preference to T. Alexander (7 out of 7), M. Oleg (4 out of 7), Ch. Andrey (3 out of 7), and among girls, K. Alina (5 out of 6), A. Irina (4 out of 6), P. Victoria (4 out of 6), D. Elizabeth (3 out of 6);

among girls, boys sympathize with K. Alina (3 out of 6), P. Victoria (2 out of 6);

from the point of view of girls, the least popular are A. Sevda (1 out of 6), K. Vladimir (1 out of 7), M. Andrey (0 out of 7), Kh. Halirbagir (1 out of 7);

from the point of view of boys, A. Irina (1 out of 6), A. Sevda (0 out of 6), D. Elizaveta (0 out of 6), K. Vladimir (1 out of 5), T. Alena (0 out of 6), T. Love (0 out of 6);

outside of school, they prefer to spend more time with T. Alexander (11 out of 12), M. Oleg (7 out of 12), P. Vika (5 out of 12);

during school hours, the greatest preference is given to K. Alina (9 out of 12), T. Alexander (8 out of 12), P. Victoria (7 out of 12), M. Oleg (6 out of 12);

M. Andrey (0 out of 12), A. Sevda (1 out of 12) turned out to be less attractive for communication outside of school hours;

on issues of study, team members rarely turn to A. Sevda (0 out of 12), K. Vladimir (0 out of 12), M. Andrey (1 out of 12).

The psychological climate is a complex psychological characteristic that reflects the state of relationships and the degree of satisfaction of team members with various factors in the life of the team.

The psychological climate (PC) of the team is always characterized by the atmosphere of the mental and emotional state of each of its participants, the individual, specific for the joint activities of people, depends on the general state of the people around him.

Based on the answers received on the method of diagnosing the socio-psychological climate in the team, it is possible to give a brief description of the team of 9th grade students.

Table 2.5 shows the results of a survey of girls.

Table 2.5

Popular answers of girls to the key questions of the methodology for diagnosing the socio-psychological climate in the team

Popular Answer Options

Do you like school?

Like it a lot - 3

Probably like it - 2

I don't care -1

I don't know - 3

M. Oleg - 4

T. Alexander - 2

H. Halirbagir - 1

Ch. Andrey - 1

A. Irina - 1

I don't know - 1

Most of the members of our collective/group are good, nice people - 3

There are all sorts of people in our team - 2

No, of course - 1

Rather yes than no - 2

Rather no than yes - 1

I don't know, I didn't think about it - 2

That would suit me just fine - 2

I don't know - 4

Very good - 2

In general, not bad, although there is room for improvement - 2

hard to say - 2

The majority of girls love their school and do not want to change it. The studies are well organized, but some feel that there is room for improvement. From their point of view, most people in their class are good and likeable people. Girls are positive about the fact that classmates live close to each other. However, the majority does not have a specific answer to the question of how they would react to a joint vacation with their class. They also believe that M. Oleg and T. Alexander are the most popular within the class.

Table 6 shows the boys' answers according to this method.

Table 2.6

Popular answers of boys to the key questions of the methodology for diagnosing the socio-psychological climate in the team

Popular Answer Options

Do you like school?

Probably like it - 4

I don't care -2

Would you like to transfer to another school?

I don't know - 3

Who is the most popular member of your group?

M. Oleg - 5

T. Alexander - 5

Ch. Andrey - 1

Suppose that for some reason you are temporarily not studying, would you return to your team?

I don't know - 1

Which of the following statements do you agree with the most?

Most of the members of our collective / group are good, nice people - 1

There are all sorts of people in our team - 4

Most of the members of our team are unpleasant people - 1

Do you think it would be good if the members of your team lived close to each other?

No, of course - 1

Rather yes than no - 1

Yes, of course - 1

I don't know, I didn't think about it - 3

If you had the opportunity to spend a vacation with members of your team, how would you react to this?

That would suit me just fine - 5

I don't know - 1

How well do you think the school is organized?

Very good - 1

In general, not bad, although there is room for improvement - 1

Hard to say - 4

Boys are more indifferent to school than girls. Half of them would not want to go to another school, but the other half did not give a definite answer. However, after a temporary suspension of studies, most of the boys would return to their school. The boys believe that there are all sorts of people in their team. And they are indifferent to whether their classmates live close to each other or not. However, most boys would enthusiastically support the idea of ​​sharing a vacation with classmates. They, like the girls, consider M. Oleg and T. Alexander as popular.

After analyzing the data obtained after the implementation of the methods, we can conclude that, in general, both boys and girls assess the situation in their team as favorable. However, most of them approach establishing contacts within the team from a pragmatic point of view, that is, according to the degree of "usefulness" of a member of the team. That does not prevent the class from rejoicing at the successes and achievements of their participants.

Both boys and girls consider the same people as their leaders, which allows us to conclude that relations within the team are close enough not to create separate groups with separate leaders within each.

Girls are more sociable than boys. They are more likely than boys to choose representatives of both sexes among their classmates. Boys try, basically, to build relationships with boys. They choose girls more often to help in the educational field. For leisure, both boys and girls prioritize members of the same sex.

Conclusion

Thus, the set goals and objectives were achieved by us. Based on the above, the individual development of a person largely depends on the establishment of diverse direct and indirect relationships with the social environment. The need for communication is the internal basis of personal relationships between people. This basic social need arises and is clearly manifested already in the earliest stages of human life. The soil for its development, as noted by L.S. Vygotsky, is that any need of an infant becomes a need for another person. Without communication, human society is unthinkable, communication is a way of uniting people and their development.

Adolescence is one of the main periods of growth and formation of the body; at this time, the activity of all organs and systems is being restructured. There is also a restructuring of the adolescent's communication with people.

Communication at this stage consists of two subsystems: a teenager's communication with adults, mainly with parents and a teacher, and communication with peers.

In the process of communication of a teenager with adults and peers, his personality is formed, the attitude of a teenager to the world is being formed.

In adolescence, the psychological climate of the team is assessed differently by each of its members. The assessment of the psychological climate is largely facilitated by the place of the individual himself in the team.

They form connections within the team according to the "usefulness" of a member of the team, his ability to help in different situations. However, girls tend to consider their team more friendly than boys. Girls are more sociable, rejoice at the success of classmates.

Communication with peers, mainly with classmates, comes to the fore. Adolescents begin to establish relationships with members of the opposite sex, however, they are not yet permanent and unstable. During extracurricular time, boys continue to communicate with boys, and girls continue to communicate with girls.

Girls are more sociable when communicating with peers, both of their own gender and of the opposite. They are more likely than boys to choose representatives of both sexes among their classmates. Boys try, basically, to build relationships with boys. They choose girls more often to help in the educational field. For leisure, both boys and girls prioritize members of the same sex.

Bibliography

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Kolominsky Ya.L. Psychology of relationships in small groups (general and age characteristics). - Minsk: BGU, 1976. - 352 p.

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Attachment 1

Test "Individual's perception of the group"

An individual's perception of a group is the background against which interpersonal perception takes place. The proposed methodology makes it possible to identify three possible "types" of perception by an individual of a group, where the role of the group in the activity of the perceiver acts as an indicator of the type of perception.

The first "type" of perception by an individual of a group is called "individualistic" (I): when an individual is neutral to the group, avoiding joint forms of activity and limiting contacts in communication. The second type of perception by an individual of a group is called "pragmatic" (P): when an individual evaluates the group in terms of usefulness and prefers contacts only with the most competent sources of information and those who are able to provide assistance. The third type of perception by an individual of a group is called "collectivistic" (C): the individual perceives the group as an independent value, while there is an interest in the success of each member of the group and the desire to contribute to the life of the group.

For each item, you need to choose only one alternative that most accurately expresses your point of view.

1. The best partners in the group, I consider those who: a) knows more than me;b) seeks to resolve all issues together;c) does not distract the attention of the teacher during classes.

2. The best teachers are those who: a) have individual approach to students;b) create conditions for help from others;c) create an atmosphere of search and collective discussion of problems.

3. I am happy when my friends: a) they know more than me and can help me;b) they are able to achieve success independently, without interfering with each other;c) help others when they are needed.

4. Most of all I like it when in a group: a) no need to help anyone and there is someone to learn from;b) each in itself is unique and does not interfere in the affairs of others;c) the rest are less prepared than me.

5. I feel like I can do a lot when: a) I am sure that I will receive help and support from others;b) I am sure that my efforts will be somehow rewarded and noted;c) an opportunity is given to prove oneself in a useful and important matter.

6. I like a group in which: a) everyone is interested in improving the results of all;b) everyone is busy with their own business and does not interfere with others;c) everyone responds to help and advice, if necessary.

7. I am not satisfied with teachers who: a) create a competitive spirit;b) are not enthusiastically engaged in their science;c) create conditions of tension and tight control.

8. I am more satisfied with life if: a) doing scientific work or learning something new;b) communicate and relax;c) is needed and useful to someone.

9. The main role of the educational institution should be: a) in the education of a citizen and a harmoniously developed personality;b) in preparing a person for independent life and activity;c) in preparation for communication and joint human activity.

10. If there is a problem in the group, then I: a) I prefer not to interfere;b) I prefer to figure everything out myself, without relying on others;c) I strive to contribute to the overall solution of the problem.

11. I would study better if teachers: a) approached me individually;b) created conditions for rendering assistance;c) created conditions for success, conditions for freedom of choice.

12. I feel bad when: a) do not achieve success in the intended business;b) I feel that I do not need a person who is very respected or loved by me;c) in difficult times, those whom you hoped for the most do not help you.

13. Most of all I appreciate: a) success, in which there is a share of the participation of my friends or relatives;b) the general success of people close and dear to me, in which there is also my merit;c) your own personal success.

14. I prefer to work: a) together with friends;b) independently;c) with leading teachers and specialists in the field.

Results processing . One point is assigned to each selected answer. The points scored for all items of the questionnaire are summed up for each type of perception separately, taking into account the proposed key. The result is written as a formula n 1, I + n 2 P + n 3 K, where n 1, n 2, n 3 - the number of points scored, respectively, "individualistic" type of perception, "pragmatic" and "collectivist".

The key for processing the results is presented in the table.

Table 1

The key for processing the results of the method "Type of perception by an individual of a group"

Annex 2

Form of sociometry methodology

Surname, name ___________________________________________

Class ____________ Gender _______________________________

Answer the questions, writing under each of them three names of your classmates.

1. With whom in the class would you like to sit together at the same desk?

2. Who would you invite from the class to your birthday party?

a) _______________________________________________________________

b) _______________________________________________________________

in) _______________________________________________________________

3. Who in your class would you go on a multi-day camping trip with?

a) _______________________________________________________________

b) _______________________________________________________________

in) _______________________________________________________________

4. Who would you like to live next door to?

a)_______________________________________________________

b) ___________________________________________________________

in)_______________________________________________________

5. With whom would you like to do homework to prepare for exams and tests?

a)________________________________________________

b) ________________________________________________

in)________________________________________________

6. With whom would you like to give up on a desert island?

a)____________________________________________

b) _______________________________________________

in)_____________________________________________

Appendix 3

The form of the methodology for diagnosing the socio-psychological climate of the team

From the proposed list of answers for each question, select those that correspond to your opinion and put a “+” sign next to such an answer.

1. Do you like your school?

a) like it very much

b) perhaps like it;

c) I don't care

d) probably don't like it;

d) don't like it very much.

2. Would you like to transfer to another school?

a) yes;

b) no;

c) I don't know.

a) diligence;

b) social activity;

c) professional knowledge;

d) caring for people;

e) exactingness;

e) responsiveness;

g) sociability;

h) the ability to understand people;

i) justice;

j) benevolence.

4. Who is the most respected member of your group/team? Name one or two names.

______________________________________________

5. Suppose that for some reason you are temporarily out of school, would you return to your team?

a) yes;

b) no;

c) I don't know.

6. Please mark which of the following statements do you agree with the most?

a) most of the members of our team/group are good, likeable people;

b) there are all sorts of people in our team;

c) most of the members of our team are unpleasant people.

7. Do you think it would be good if the members of your team lived close to each other?

a) no, of course not;

b) rather no than yes;

c) I don’t know, I didn’t think about it;

d) rather yes than no;

e) Yes, of course.

8. If you had the opportunity to spend a vacation with members of your team, how would you react to this?

a) that would suit me just fine;

b) don't know

c) It would not suit me at all.

9. How well do you think the school is organized?

a) very good

b) generally not bad, although there is room for improvement;

c) hard to say

d) training is organized unsatisfactorily;

e) very bad.

10. Your gender:

a) male;

b) female.

11. Age.

____________

12. Class

Introduction

Conclusion

List of used sources and literature

Applications

Introduction

As you know, the need for communication, in positive relationships with other people is one of the basic human needs. The success of professional activity, activity in public life and, finally, the personal happiness of everyone depend to a large extent on how successful a person is in communication.

In the life of every person there are periods when communication issues are particularly acute. This often happens for the first time during adolescence. The peer group becomes for the teenager the environment in which he tries to realize his needs and abilities. One is looking for reinforcements of self-respect, recognition of his human worth. The other needs emotional involvement with the group. The third receives the missing information and develops communication skills. The fourth satisfies leadership needs. At school, such a group for many teenagers is the class.

In order to form and develop communication skills in adolescents, for several years our school has been conducting classes on the course "Psychology of Man and Society". They allow not only to comprehend their ideas about a person, but also to get acquainted with the opinions and theories that already exist in science and culture. Come out to understand social phenomena and situations..

But communication in the classroom is not just communication of peers, but also communication of boys and girls. Therefore, the study of communication in a group should involve such a way of knowing reality, in which there is no "asexual view" of social and mental phenomena.

Issues related to the characteristics of the sex of a person and his psychological differences have recently been among the most actively discussed in society. In works devoted to this issue, the concept of "gender" is often used.

Gender in psychology is a socio-biological characteristic, with the help of which people define the concepts of "man" and "woman". In other words, to be a woman or a man means to follow certain socio-cultural patterns presented by society in relation to a person on the basis of accepted gender rules.

In today's society, the social role functions of men and women are largely undergoing major changes when part of the traditional roles of one biological sex is assimilated and demonstrated by the opposite sex. At the same time, in everyday life, we are constantly confronted in one form or another with ideas about the differences between the sexes. In the most generalized form, they are represented by stereotypes of masculinity and femininity. Traditionally, in the public mind, a man should be strong, independent, active, aggressive, self-sufficient, focused on individual achievements. A woman - gentle, tactful, patient, weak, dependent, emotional, family-oriented.

Gender roles are acquired in the process of socialization. The development of a gender role implies the presence of not only a certain type of behavior, but also personal characteristics and even an entire lifestyle.

An exceptionally important condition for gender socialization is a society of peers, both of one's own and of the opposite sex. After analyzing the materials published in the specialized literature and the media, we noticed that this problem is especially acute for boys, in whom gender-role expectations are extremely rigid and overestimated. Already preschoolers choose a partner for various activities, taking into account gender differences: most often boys choose boys, and girls choose girls. Observing the process of communication in school classes, we also identified two structures of personal relationships - "boys" and "girls". Boys rarely choose girls, as, indeed, girls choose boys. Consequently, a student receives one or another status in the system of personal relationships on the basis of sympathy from representatives of his gender. At the same time, there are practically no studies on how the ideas of boys and girls about each other affect the situation of communication in the classroom.

In this way, relevance This study is determined by the need to study and improve the conditions for gender socialization of adolescents, the preparation of adolescents for life in society, for the fulfillment of the social roles of men and women.

Target our study is to study the socio-psychological characteristics of communication in groups of boys and girls.

The goal is realized through a number of tasks:

Compare sociometric structures in subgroups of boys and girls;

To study gender stereotypes in selected subgroups;

Determine the preferred qualities in friends of different sexes depending on the sociometric status;

To reveal the influence of gender representations on the status in the group.

To achieve the goal, methods such as "Personal semantic differential" (Appendix No. 1) and a sociometric procedure were chosen, which were carried out in the group interaction mode (Appendix No. 2).

The results of the study will improve the communicative competence of high school students, improve relations in groups of adolescents.

Study of the socio-psychological characteristics of communication in adolescence. Gender aspect

The study involved 48 people, students of grades 9-10 of Gymnasium No. 18 in the city of Stary Oskol, Belgorod Region, of which 18 boys and 30 girls, the average age of the subjects was 14.43 years.

After manual processing of the tests, the results were entered into a summary table, which is presented in Appendix No. 7. The program Statistika 6.0 was used for processing. Primary statistics were calculated (means, standard deviations), and a correlation analysis of the data was carried out. To determine the significance of differences, the Pearson linear correlation coefficient was used, with an error probability of 5%.

At the first stage of the analysis, the following “portraits” were obtained:

Girls from a girls point of view

Boys from the point of view of girls

Boys from the point of view of boys

Girls from the point of view of boys

A comparative analysis of the obtained data was carried out.

Diagram No. 1 (see Appendix No. 3) reflects the portrait of the "Girlfriend" both from the point of view of the girls themselves and from the point of view of the boys.

In general, the group describes girls in communication as charming, open, responsive, friendly and sociable (the highest scores);

The group of girls compared to the group of boys more often describe themselves as strong, dependent, responsive, sociable and irritable. While boys are more likely to appreciate such qualities as weakness, independence and equanimity. In the correlation analysis, significant relationships were obtained between such parameters as gender and characteristics: social status (choice of girls), equanimity and weakness in the assessment of girls, sociability, charm, calmness, confidence in the assessment of boys, integrative characteristics of activity both in the group of boys and in a group of girls. That is, girls are more active in communication (there are more choices), boys more often rate girls as weak and unflappable, and girls rate boys as sociable, charming, fussy and confident, in general, boys rate both their own activity and activity lower girls.

The greatest spread in opinions was obtained when evaluating the following qualities: "stubborn - compliant", "independent - dependent", "confident - insecure". It is these qualities that are traditionally rated low in women, which may be the reason for the scatter of opinions.

Integrative indicators of strength, activity and assessments for the group of girls are positive, while the highest indicators are assessments, girls rate themselves higher than boys.

Girls through the eyes of girls Girls through the eyes of boys

Diagram #1

Diagram No. 2 (see Appendix No. 4.5) reflects the portrait of the "Boy Friend" both from the point of view of girls and from the point of view of the boys themselves.

Based on the data obtained, the following conclusions can be drawn.

The group as a whole evaluates boys in almost all characteristics (except for such an indicator as "strong") below girls.

It should be noted that boys rate themselves lower (more negatively) than girls rate them. It can be assumed that girls have certain expectations from the behavior of boys, girls rate boys as more conscientious, open, energetic, confident and sociable, while boys themselves rate these characteristics lower.

The greatest spread in opinions was obtained when evaluating the following qualities: "stubborn - compliant", "decisive - indecisive", "independent - dependent" and "irritable - unperturbed". Unlike the group of girls, these qualities are traditionally rated higher in men.

Diagram #2

At the second stage of the analysis, the influence of ideas about boys and girls on the success of communication was determined. All significant correlation coefficients are given in Appendix No. 6.

With the help of correlation analysis, links were also established between the parameters of social status and the assessment of various qualities of both boys and girls. The correlation pleiad No. 1 reflects the relationship of social status and such characteristics as "Conscientiousness - irresponsibility in boys." Thus, adolescents with a high social status rate girls' friendliness and boys' conscientiousness higher. Also, the social status of adolescents depends on age and increases with age.

Introduction

Joint labor of men and women -

This is a huge step forward, but at the same time

and a huge problem to be solved.

Issues related to the characteristics of the sex of a person and his psychological differences have recently been among the most actively discussed in society.

Not only representatives of different cultures speak differently, but also men and women. Communication between a man and a woman is also a kind of intercultural communication. The statement about men and women as absolutely identical people is initially incorrect. First of all, both of them are people, individuals with equal opportunities, rights and freedoms. The opposite characteristics of men and women, such as, for example, rationality, restraint of the former and emotionality, openness of the latter, are dictated not by biological affiliation, but rather spiritual, to one sex or another.

Similar differences between physiological and spiritual states are expressed respectively in the following English words sex `gender' and gender `gender'. Sex (sex) is a term that denotes those anatomical - biological features of people (mainly in the reproductive system) on the basis of which people are defined as men or women. Gender (gender) - a set of speech, behavioral, personality traits that distinguish men and women exposed to culture, spiritually.

In my work, I will try to consider the influence of the gender aspect on the communicative behavior of women and men.

Gender Features of Communicative Behavior

The problems associated with "misunderstanding", arising in the process of interpersonal communication between men and women, excite both the subjects of communication themselves and researchers of various specialties, united in their research by gender methodology. The activity of gender researchers, reflected both in scientific and popular science publications, finds a lively response from the consumers of this kind of knowledge, from ordinary men and women who communicate with each other.

It should be noted that the data on male and female verbal communication cannot be considered the only true and well-established for the following reasons:

Firstly, the volume of material for each researcher is small, so it is difficult to conduct a full study of this problem and draw objective conclusions;

Secondly, the violation of gender integrity (i.e., the divergence of biological and psychological) leads to a decrease in the differentiation of male and female speech, and women may show masculine features of speech behavior, and men - feminine ones;

Thirdly, the influence of non-sex factors (communication situation, age, profession, education, level of general culture, etc.) makes it difficult to identify purely gender differences and call the results of the study unambiguous.

However, studies by many scientists confirm the existence of differences in the speech of men and women.

The style of communicative behavior is influenced by the typical features of the representatives of one or another gender. Here are the typical features of men and women:

These and other traits affect the perception of the world by members of the opposite sex.

Many men perceive the world as a separate person in the hierarchy of social order, in which he is above or below others. In such a world, as D. Tannen notes, conversations come down to negotiations in which people try to achieve a better position, maintain it as much as possible and protect themselves from the attempts of others to belittle or push them around. Life is thus a competition, a struggle for the right to maintain one's independence and avoid failure. Women generally perceive life as a separate person in the structure of mutual relations. In their world, conversations resemble negotiations aimed at achieving even greater intimacy, in which people try to find and give each other help and support, to reach an agreement. They try to protect themselves from attempts by others to push them away. Life is thus a community, an effort to maintain close relationships and avoid loneliness. Although this world has its own hierarchies, but these are more hierarchies of friendship, rather than domination and achievement. Intimacy is the key word in the world of connections, where each person negotiates in a complex structure of friendships, trying to reach agreement, avoiding superiority. In a world dominated by social status, the key word is independence , because the main means of establishing social status is the ability to order others, and if you follow the order, then this is an indicator that you are on a lower level. Although each person needs both intimacy and independence, women tend to prioritize the former and men the latter.

Already from childhood, women learn to conduct cooperative conversations, conversation-communication, that is, they learn to be benevolent, express sympathy, and provide support. For women, conversation is a means of rapprochement and mutual understanding. In this regard, they ask more questions and express more replica-reactions.

Men, on the other hand, tend to have “one-sided” conversations, informational conversations that take the form of “talk-message”.

Their conversations focus not on feelings and relationships, but on demonstrating their knowledge, skills, awareness. From childhood, men learn to use conversations to attract attention and not lose it. Therefore, they feel comfortable in large groups consisting of people they do not know, in other words, during public speaking. For women, this is a dead end situation, they are more willing to have a conversation in a circle of close people, they prefer private conversations. Women in a conversation are trying to achieve a state of harmony, agreement between people, and men simply convey information about all significant events. For a man, when he sits at home, there is absolutely nothing to talk about. But a group of three or four people appears nearby - he experiences a surge of desire to talk about how he loves this world.

If women speak and hear conversation based on relationships of connection and intimacy, and men speak and hear conversation based on position and freedom, then communication between men and women can be considered as communication between different cultures due to the clash of conversational styles. Instead of various dialects, they speak the so-called rhodolects.

The difference in communication styles is the result of different upbringing. Boys and girls grow up in different verbal worlds. People talk to them in different ways and expect different responses from them. AT childhood each of us has been told more than once: “Good girls don’t behave like that” or “A real man doesn’t act like that”, “Don’t be a girl”. A girl, unlike a boy, is brought up, developing in her such qualities as modesty, unobtrusiveness, emotionality, the desire to share her feelings, deliberate behavior, the ability to sympathize, the ability to help others, understand others, etc.

From childhood, boys play group games with a clear hierarchy, they constantly identify winners in their environment, spend a lot of time and effort identifying their place in the hierarchy and strive to rise in it, looking for a variety of ways to do this. Because of the place in the hierarchy, disputes and fights arise.

Girls' games run more calmly, without a rigid hierarchy and clear leaders, girls do not fight for status, find compromises more often, seek common agreement, try to agree all together, quarrel much less than boys, do not form rigid closed hierarchical groups.

All these circumstances influence the formation of differences in the styles of speech communication between men and women.

Men directly express their thoughts. Women, on the other hand, circle around the purpose of the conversation for a long time, they are less straightforward. Men, expressing their thoughts, logically build their statements step by step, unlike women who always change the sequence of their thoughts, that is, they do it illogically.

Men are goal oriented in conversation (information exchange) and women are process oriented (interaction), men like brevity, they need facts, and women like to discuss details.

Women's style communication is “soft” in character, male - “hard” . Women often use interrogative sentences in speech, including disjunctive questions. (“He is it?”), use words that mean insecure the truth of what they say. Men, on the other hand, are more straightforward, giving clear, unambiguous orders rather than asking as a question.

During conversations, women ask their interlocutor many questions. Thus, they keep the conversation going, find out what others are interested in, show their interest in the conversation. If women nevertheless interrupt, it is often to support the speaker, but not to challenge his point of view, as men do.

Men's style speech includes such features of communicative control as verbosity, control of the topic of conversation and interruption. Many studies confirm that in a conversation between a man and a woman, men talk longer. Sometimes their story resembles a lecture, and the woman becomes the listener, so men tend to take a dominant position. Interrupting, men tend to take control of the topic of conversation or the whole conversation itself.

During public conversations, men speak more often and longer. For example, Barbara and Jean Inkins, while researching connections and communication, recorded and then analyzed the course of seven faculty meetings at the university. They found that, with one exception, the men spoke more often and spoke longer. Men's performances lasted from 10.66 to 17.07 seconds, women - from 3 to 10 seconds. In other words, the women's longest performances were still shorter than the men's shortest performances. It is also noted that men are more likely to ask questions. Their duration for men is 52.7 seconds, for women - 23.1 seconds. The fact is that men often, before asking a question, make some kind of message, ask more than one question, and after the received answer ask the next question or again make their comment. Moreover, it should be noted that the questions of men are of a rather aggressive nature, being questions - challenges.

Men and women are so different from each other that when they talk about the same thing, they mean completely different things, here are a few examples.

Interpretation of the interlocutor's thought from the perspective of the influence of gender

	Request for support, sympathy	Please suggest a solution
Reaction to the problem	Shows understanding, support, empathy	Trying to convince the situation is not so bad
Suggestion to do something	They say "come on"	order
Use words like "Ok", etc.	To show their interest, imply "Yes, I'm listening to you"	Only when they agree with the interlocutor
Apologize means...	Express sympathy, not regret	Admit defeat (which men rarely do)
When they are interrupted, he (a) ...	Offended that a man intervenes and changes the topic of conversation	He believes that he is not allowed to finish the thought himself
During a conversation...	Predominantly monitors the tone, manner of communication	Focuses more on content than form

The listening styles of the opposite sexes also differ.

Men's style, as O.A. Baeva, is characterized by the manifestation of attention to the content of the conversation. The hearing itself lasts 10-15 seconds. As soon as it becomes clear what is being said, men focus on critical remarks or interrupt the interlocutor.

Women's style is distinguished by great attention to the emotional side of the message, the very process of communication, and not to the content of the conversation.

Based on the foregoing, the male style of communication can be described as more active and objective, but at the same time, more competitive and conflict than female. At the same time, for a man, the content of joint activity is more important than individual sympathy for partners. Male communication is more emotional restraint. Women express their feelings and emotions more freely and more fully, they have a need to share their experiences with someone, as well as the ability to empathize. The male attitude to the world around is characterized by assertiveness, self-confidence, orientation to control. In order to separate oneself from the world, it is necessary to manipulate someone from the environment, thus making sure of one's independence. The man is convinced that standing on top of the situation - necessary condition for survival.

Thus, it becomes obvious that there are a number of differences in the speech behavior of men and women that leave their mark on the course of communication.

If we are talking about intercultural dialogue of representatives of the opposite sex, then the interaction of different cultures is assumed. Consequently, the peculiarities of the mentality and stereotypes of behavior of representatives of a particular country will leave an imprint on the style of communication between men and women. Based on the analysis of the work of domestic and foreign scientists in the field of intercultural communication, as well as their own observations and the results of an interview conducted at a Russian university with foreign interns, the following features of verbal (dialogical and polylogical) communication in English (American) and Russian-speaking environment as shown in the following table.

Sociocultural features of dialogic/polylogical communication in the English-speaking (American) and Russian-speaking environment

English (American) environment	Russian-speaking environment
The nature of the dialogue / polylogue	Cooperation	Rivalry (competitive and sometimes even aggressive)
Motivational Orientation	Creating a positive image: maintaining a conflict-free atmosphere of communication, avoiding verbal and non-verbal acts that cause negative emotions and / or reactions from the interlocutor (the phenomenon of politeness)	Creating and maintaining one's own image: the desire to win a moral and intellectual victory over the interlocutor, neutralizing, convincing, suppressing him; to impose one's will and through this to carry out one's intentions
Purpose of communication	Maintaining the Communication process by searching for common ground between interlocutors and finding a compromise, maintaining and deepening social and interpersonal relationships between interlocutors and within society as a whole	“Truth is born in a dispute” - good tone it is considered to have a point of view and be able to defend it
Degree of information content	Quite often there is a commitment to uninformative secular conversation on trivial topics (small talk)	As a rule, high information content of the dialogue/polylogue
Personal involvement	Restraint. Avoiding self-disclosure and imposing one's point of view on interlocutors; conversation on "explosive topics" (politics, nationality, religion, wages) is not encouraged	A large degree of “openness” to the interlocutor, a high norm of sincerity, which manifests itself in a more frank and emotional interpretation of personal topics (including in conversations with little-known people) and a willingness to discuss topics that are potentially fraught with conflicts (politics, religion, morality)
Attitude to someone else's point of view	High tolerance, search for a compromise; Using verbal and non-verbal signs of support and approval, complementing the interlocutor's remarks or developing his point of view	Low tolerance; Expressing critical remarks and advice as a manifestation of care and attention (“Better the bitter truth than the sweet lie”)
Emotionally expressive tone	Decreased, which manifests itself in “understatement”, avoidance of a violent manifestation of emotions	Tall, fairly free expression of emotions, which is considered more of an advantage than a disadvantage, a tendency to exaggerate
Speech etiquette
Objection	The desire to avoid sharp denials and objections, categorical statements; Use of veiled ways of expressing disagreement; Semi-interrogative intonations at the end of affirmative sentences; Sharp forms of objection, elements of the dispute are brought into a conversation that does not involve debatable
Expressing your point of view	Softening one's position: softening disagreement by replacing a negative answer with a neutral one	Active expression of one's point of view, if necessary, a verbal conflict with the interlocutor is possible (the speaker can provoke a conflict himself)
disagreement	To express your disagreement, you need good reasons (the severity of the situation, the importance of the problem, personal dislike for the interlocutor)	A Russian needs additional incentives not to express his disagreement (the difference in age and social status, the desire to manipulate people, personal sympathy for the interlocutor)
Politeness
To strangers
To acquaintances	conspicuous
The courtesy of the attendants	Increased	Reduced
Courtesy towards women		Increased
Topics of communication
A frank conversation	Missing	Priority (even with strangers)
Secular fellowship	positive attitude	Negative attitude
Intimacy of information requested/reported
The degree of taboo in communication	Noticeable
Duration of communication
Expanded dialogue / polylogue	Precedence of brevity	Deployment priority
Long pauses in communication	Allowed	Invalid
Nonverbal behavior
Facial expressions (smiling	They smile constantly. It is not customary to walk with a sad look. Smiling shows politeness	Smiling is not a sign of politeness. Smiling is incompatible with serious work. Don't smile at strangers
communication distance		short
Eye contact	Mandatory	Mandatory
Physical contact of people	Rarely used	Quite widely used
Intensity of gesticulation	below average

Thus, the results of the analysis given in this table allow us to conclude that the sociocultural differences between verbal (dialogical and polylogical) and non-verbal communication of representatives of Russian-speaking and English-speaking (American) cultures are quite obvious. They are explained by the peculiarities of the national mentality, cultural traditions, customs and, accordingly, must certainly be taken into account in the process of communication of representatives of the opposite sex.

Sexual characteristics of the psyche significantly affect communication. Girls are more in need of communication, more sensitive to the state of the interlocutor and attitude towards him, more trustful of good words. The logic of their reasoning is more hidden due to the tendency to omit the connections and premises that are obvious to them (but not obvious to boys and male teachers). The straightforward, overly rational logic of men's reasoning does not impress them, therefore females communicate more easily with each other and often take offense at men for their rudeness, straightforwardness, and incomprehension. As a result, a heart-to-heart talk with girls will be better for a woman.

10.1. The importance of communication for men and women

V. B. Bulanova (2005) notes that the attitude to communication among girls is characterized by the need for a girlfriend, attraction to older boys, and orientation to the authority of adults; in boys - the desire to take their place in the team, the desire to achieve peer recognition, the need to communicate with girls and the need to communicate "on an equal footing" with adults.

The great preoccupation of girls with their appearance and behavior is an indirect manifestation of their interest in the opinion of others about themselves. Girls ask parents more questions about social relationships (W. Johnson, L. Ter-man, 1940; L. Terman, L. Tyler, 1954). As a result, girls are more ready to communicate than boys. O. A. Tyrnova (1996a, b), for example, found that boys more often than girls use template types of interaction. They, to a lesser extent than girls, own the techniques and methods of communication. Girls are more flexible and varied in communication.

The greater desire of girls to communicate, compared with boys, has also been shown by other researchers (L. S. Sapozhnikova, 1973). The same was found in adults (See: Psychological and psychophysiological characteristics of students. Kazan, 1977; S. M. Petrova, 1995). A. A. Bodalev (1983), for example, found that the volume of communication in men is one and a half times less than in women. At the same time, as shown by T. V. Arkhireeva (2007), boys are more satisfied with relationships with their peers than girls.

It is often believed that women spend more time talking than men. However, this view is not supported by the empirical evidence from studies of "the amount of time spent talking" (Kollock, Blumstein, Schwarz, 1985; Swacker, 1975; Zimmerman West, 1975). Research data shows the exact opposite result: if you take into account all the time spent talking, then men say more women (Kollock et al., 1985).

Paludy M., 2003, p. 223.

The great importance of communication for women is also emphasized by the fact that in people aged 70 to 90 years, sociability gives a high positive correlation with the experience of happiness among women, but does not show the same relationship in men. (W. Johnson, L. Termal, 1940).

Women more than men need an intimate (trusting) relationship with a member of the opposite sex (husband, son or lover). It is through the establishment of intimate relationships that women acquire a consciousness of their own importance (in contrast to men, who acquire consciousness of their own importance through success at work, and intimate relationships are in the background for them).

10.2. Gender characteristics of social perception

The greater subjective significance for women of interaction with another person and relationships in general results in a relatively greater development of their social-perceptual abilities than in men: women more subtly capture the state of another person by changes in the timbre of the voice and in other expressive manifestations, more accurately determine the effect its own impact on another person.

Female faces give a more detailed description of the other person than male faces. This was revealed, in particular, in the study of A. A. Bodalev. Girls noted all personality traits (with the exception of attitude to work) more often than boys, while gender differences in the frequency of recording communicative character traits and intellectual qualities were significant. At the same time, the characteristics of the personality as a whole were given by young men twice as often as by girls.

The attitude towards the person with whom we are constantly forced to communicate affects social perception. For example, it was found that when evaluating a favorite teacher, students mainly note his positive qualities, and girls find them more often than boys; when evaluating an unloved teacher, his negative qualities are mainly noted, while boys find these qualities more than girls. Thus, in assessing both a favorite and an unloved teacher, girls show greater benevolence than boys.

10.3. Sexual features of choosing a partner for communication by children

Differences in children's attitudes towards peers of the opposite sex also affect their choice of partners for communication and games. Similar tendencies are present, according to E. R. Slobodskaya (1980), already in nursery children of 3 years old when playing with peers. Such an early manifestation of sexual differentiation in communication, according to the author, allows us to raise the question of the contribution of the genetic factor to the manifestation of this phenomenon.

According to E. R. Slobodskaya and Yu. M. Plyusnin (1987), with the spatial proximity of children (when the distance between them is less than a meter), there is a clear preference for boys over boys, the absence of mutual preferences for girls and a smaller expected number of preferences for each other by children of different sexes .

A similar nature of preferences is also noted in interactions during object play and taking away an object: boys prefer to play with each other and more often take objects from each other; girls do not show mutual preferences, and the frequency of contacts between boys and girls is less than expected.

When choosing partners for communication and games, children are guided by those personal qualities and behaviors that correspond to the female and male sex. Relationships between boys are built, as a rule, on the recognition of the ability to organize, achieve a positive result, defend one's opinion, and protect oneself. Girls in relationships with girls are attracted primarily by spiritual qualities, appearance.

Domestic and foreign researchers note the role of differences in interests and preferred activities, which largely determine the association of preschoolers for role-playing games with peers of the same sex (J. Campbell; S. Golberg, M. Lewis ; V. Khartup, A. Tsuk ; T. A. Repina, 1984; I. V. Telnyuk, 1999).

gender consolidation, seen in younger preschoolers, in the pre-school age, not only strengthens, but even increases: 91% of selective contacts the child establishes with peers of the same sex and only 9% - with children of the opposite sex. Of all game associations, 75% were homogeneous in gender, and if only stable associations are taken into account, then their number increases to 91% (T. A. Repina).

According to I. V. Telnyuk, contacts and play interaction of children preschool age of the same sex in most cases are longer and at the same time there are fewer conflict situations. Game contacts are not violated if one boy plays among the girls. The appearance of the second boy entails rivalry and inconsistency in the children's play actions. Boys also accept girls in their games, but they don’t like it when there are a lot of them.

For boys, peers of the same sex are more important, since boys gravitate less to adults, to the family, they are more sensitive to social pressure from peers when behavior is unacceptable for their gender. L. Weizmann (L. weitzman, 1979) believes that one of the functions of a same-sex peer group for a boy is that in it he acquires masculine traits and the necessary independence from his mother through solidarity with peers and through competition with them. Therefore, group activities are more characteristic of boys' games. Girls games take place in smaller groups, less aggressiveness, more reciprocity and trust (lever, 1978).

The assessment of the acceptability of another person is associated with the idea of ​​a similarly high mutual assessment on the part of this person (N.V. Bakhareva, 1976). This relationship is higher in girls than boys, regardless of age. Consequently, for girls, the role of self-image on the part of others is more important for establishing relationships with them than for boys. In general, according to E. N. Andreeva (2005), girls more than boys expect a positive attitude from others.

Due to higher competitiveness, boys more often than girls prefer to be friends with those who achieve less success and distance themselves from those peers who have better educational or sports performance. (S. Cross, L. Madson, 1997). Female students, on the contrary, were friends with those who sought best results than themselves.

10.4. The social circle of women and men

A. A. Bodalev showed that women of different ages have more people in the circle of direct communication than men. This is also confirmed by the data obtained by I. S. Cohn (1972). If young men in communication with representatives of the opposite sex are guided mainly by their peers, then girls in a significant part of them are guided by older male representatives. So, according to I. S. Kon, answering the question: “What age of a friend would you prefer?”, 80% of young men preferred a peer, 20% - an older one, and only in rare cases - a younger one. Girls, on the other hand, give preference to the elders in 40-50% and do not choose anyone younger than themselves. At the same time, their position regarding communication with persons different ages extremely controversial. So, they willingly take care of (help, instruct, care for) the younger children.

According to A. A. Bodalev (1983), in the circle of closest contacts of men, people engaged in the same activities as them turned out to be 21–34% more than women. In comparison with women, among the people subjectively significant for them, with whom they directly communicated, there were also more people with a higher social status (by 24-27%).

The basis for including this or that person in the social circle of men is the possibility of receiving various assistance from these persons, as well as their participation in meeting everyday household needs. With age, the reasons for the formation of a circle of direct communication change. If in children preference is given to emotional and gender characteristics, then in adults the main factor in choosing communication partners is pragmatism.

Interesting Facts identified by R. Hagen and A. Kahn (R. Hagen, A. Kahn, 1975): in real interpersonal interaction and in purely personal terms, highly competent women do not enjoy the favor of not only men, but also women. The authors experimentally found that both of them tend to exclude competent women from their group. The authors explain this by the fact that the high competence of women violates the existing sex-role stereotypes. The loss of a man to a woman almost always means a decrease in his self-esteem, since a “real” man must always beat a woman (obviously, for this reason, separate competitions for men and women for the world chess championship are held, although some prominent representatives of the “weaker” sex have repeatedly argued that they are no weaker than many international male grandmasters).

In old age, women tend to actively expand interpersonal contacts, while men limit their contacts to the family (N.V. Panina, N.N. Sachuk, 1985).

10.5. Closeness of communication and gender

Among friendly girls, relationships are more trusting than among boys (K. Rubin ). In girls, close friendships with the opposite sex are established earlier than in boys (R. Sharabani et al.).

The same trend continues in adults. According to M. Argyle and other authors (M. Caldwell, L. Peplau, 1982; K. Dolgin et al., 1991; D. Shaffer et al., 1991), women have closer friendships than men, are more self-disclosing and have more intimate conversations. Moreover, the intimacy of relations is already strongly manifested in adolescent girls, which encourages them to establish contacts with persons of the opposite sex. A. A. Bodalev (1979) notes that indirect evidence of the greater importance of the sphere of interpersonal, in particular intimate, communications for women and less for men are the causes of male and female neuroses. According to the Psychoneurological Institute. V. M. Bekhterev, about 80% of neuroses in women are the result of such a development of relationships in the family sphere, which is at odds with their desires, with their claims, and in men this factor is related to neuroses only in 20% of cases. Women experience the absence of intimate relationships more than men, but at the same time they are better able to disguise and sublimate.

Fylde (Fild, 1999) reports that women maintain friendships and the same degree of intimacy throughout adulthood. Men, on the other hand, have fewer new friends, less desire for close friendships, and less intimacy in relationships. Women, especially in adulthood, regret the loss of friends caused by moving, breaking up or death. (Steven, Van Tilburg, 2000).

…All this proves that for a woman, friendship is very important throughout the life cycle. (Kuttler et al., 1999; Rose, 1995; Rose, Roads, 1987; Roy et al. 2000; Stevens, Van Tilburg, 2000). The researchers also report that some women endure the end of a friendship much more painfully than the end of a love relationship.

Paludy M., 2003, p. 251.

Both men and women describe their friendships with women as closer, more joyful, and mutually caring.

Although men are more prone to joint activities and games with friends, they have more "secrets" than women, are less frank and reluctant to share intimate information with others. Even when they have a strong enough sense of affection, they are afraid to show it, since self-disclosure is considered a sign of weakness and leads to a loss of respect from other men. Therefore, men are lonelier than women. Although men may have a wider social circle, communication is more superficial than that of women. Emotional support is rarely expected from men, as they react to the disclosure of the feelings of another person in front of them in such a logical and unemotional way that it can be mistaken for rejection. In turn, men who avoid self-disclosure thereby reduce the opportunity to receive support from others, since others may not be aware that such support is required (M. Saurer, R. Eisler, 1990).

Women consider their communication with people close to them closer and more stable than men. 57% of women noted an increase in closeness with other people with age, and only 7% of them spoke about its decrease. In men, only 25% of the examined confirmed its increase, and 51% - a decrease. 29% of men rated their communicative contacts with women as closer and at the same time more unstable than with men.

Sexual division of activities limits the ability of men and women to become friends (Benison et al., 1998). Women report that their friendships with men provide them with less rewards, intimacy, and support compared to female friendships. (Basow, 1986). Susan Basow noticed that in a relationship between a man and a woman, men prefer to reveal strength, and women prefer weakness.

Paludy M., 2003, p. 252–253.

10.6. Sex differences in the use of verbal means of communication

A number of authors note differences in male and female speech. According to M.A. Kutsyreva (2004), compared to women, men have a significantly higher average size of pauses and the proportion of pauses in speech, vocabulary diversity decreases with age and the total number of words increases, the ratio of incomplete sentences is significantly lower than that of women. The latter have higher temporal characteristics of speech than men.

Some researchers propose to divide speech patterns, as well as speech topics, into “female” and “male” types. (Carli, Bukato, 2000; Tannen, 1999, 2000). For example, Robin Laikoff (Lakoff, 1975) noted that women experience two types of linguistic discrimination: 1) when women are taught (?! - E . AND.) special forms of expressions rarely used by men are dividing questions (“isn't it?”, “Yes?”, “Is that so?”) And determinants; 2) sexism is manifested in the structure of the language (for example, expressions with unequal connotations are used, like a master (English - master) and mistress (English - mistress).

Researchers studying language patterns have noted that, in general, a woman’s speech from the side often seems slurred and unconvincing, while the words of a man, on the contrary, seem understandable and convincing. (Tannen, 2000).

... Many women in speech make long requests (carli, 1999). For example, the words "please", "please" or the phrases "I would appreciate it if ...". Women use expressive expressions: “you know”, “ah”, “mmm”, “I’ll think about it now”, “well”, “yes.”. Women are less likely to use expressive expressions in conversations with other women than in conversations with men - based on such data, it can be concluded that women are more pleasant to communicate with other women than with men.

Paludy M., 2003, p. 221, 223.

Differences in appeals. Appeals directed to men and women also differ. R. Rubin (R. Rubin, 1981) revealed in a survey of university teachers that students named young female teachers much more often than men. Sportswriters refer to tennis players by their first names much more often than tennis players (53% and 8%, respectively). In affectionate nicknames, a woman turns into food or animal cubs: sweet, lamb, candy, kitten, bunny, chicken, etc. According to psychologists, this confirms the attitude towards a woman as a person with a lower status.

A. Kirilina (1999) notes that women more often resort to diminutive suffixes in appeals to make their speech petulant, diminutive.

Gender differences in verbal communication

There is not the slightest reason to believe that the differences observed between male and female turns of speech give rise to "problems" for any group. (canary, house, 1993). However, many differences have been found between female and male speech patterns, and the solution to this problem has intrigued scientists. Mulak (Mulac, 1998) drew attention to two differences in language use between men and women that seem to have attracted widespread attention:

Women use twice as many amplifiers and general concepts as men. Amplifiers are words that modify other words and serve to emphasize the thought conveyed by the original word. Thus, in accordance with the study of the actual speech practice of men and women, women are most likely to use words like terrible, absolutely and So(as in the sentence "It was absolutely wonderful" or "It's so important"). General concepts modify words to soften and weaken the thought conveyed by the original word. According to research, women prefer to use words like to some extent maybe or may be(for example: “It was somewhat interesting that…” or “It might be important that…”).

Women ask questions more often than men. Women are much more likely than men to include questions like, “Do you think so?” and "Are you sure?" In general, women tend to use questions to get more information and details, as well as to determine how others perceive the information.

…Julia Wood (Wood, 1997) attributes these differences in language use to differences in the basic psychological attitudes acquired in the process of growing up. Women form their gender identity by seeing themselves as “like” or related to their mother. They learn to use communication as an important way to establish and maintain relationships with the opposite sex. Men form their gender identity by understanding how they are different or "separate" from their mother. Thus, they use speech as a way to control, maintain independence, and elevate status.

Werderber R., Werderber K., 2007, p. 70–72.

Men speak with pressure, interrupt the interlocutor, while women (especially in heterosexual groups) prefer less direct ways of influencing the interlocutor - they interrupt less, are more tactful and polite, less self-confident. They ask questions more often, repeating them, more often expressing doubt or denial about their statements in order to soften their opinion and show at least minimal support to the other speaker. L. Carly with co-authors (L. Carli et al., 1995) found that women have slightly more justified intonation than men. As R. Lakoff (2000) writes, women speak in the so-called "powerless language", expressing the lack of authority. The feminine style of speech is characterized by an attitude towards equality and cooperativeness. In the speech of men, there is more aggressiveness and swagger.

Men's conversation has a "reporting" character, while women talk "about little things." Men's conversation is aimed at achieving a certain "status quo", and women's conversation is aimed at affirming consent and intimacy (N. Kurilovich, 2001).

Women are able to listen and focus on the problem of the interlocutor, less likely to interrupt him in the process of dialogue.

Usually in a mixed company, a woman is not expected to talk a lot. (Beaumont et al., 1998; Libra, 1987; Welte, 1998). In addition, the silence of girls and women is directly related to the fact that they want to attract the interlocutor and please him. Here are the lyrics from the song to the film "The Little Mermaid":

You want your face and all your beauty.
Let your body speak.
There, on land, men do not like chatter.
If a girl cracks incessantly, she quickly gets bored.
It is better for a real lady to be silent like a fish.
And why would she gossip and chatter?
For men, words mean nothing -
A real gentleman doesn't say a word,
But he loses his head from a mysterious stranger.
A girl with a tongue on the lock will receive a loved one as a reward.

Paludy M., 2003, p. 224.

In everyday life, however, these differences are often not noted. So, N. O. Tairova (2005) writes that the question “Does male speech differ from female?” women basically answer “no”, and if “yes”, then only with speed and a wide variety of everyday topics. As for professional speech, according to both men and women, it does not differ. The older the man answering this question, the more often he says that there are no differences between male and female speech. The same is shown by very young male informants (under 27). Between the ages of 30 and 37, men categorically say that there are differences in male and female speech, and their speech is divided into “female” and “human in general”.

10.7. Sex differences in the use of non-verbal means of communication

Non-verbal communication between men and women also has some differences. Women, to a greater extent than men, prefer to see than to hear, i.e. they trust visual (non-verbal) information more (Atwater, 1988).

An exchange of glances. As noted by E. R. Slobodskaya and Yu. M. Plyusnin (1987), the views directed by boys on boys are more than those directed at girls. Girls also have more views towards boys than towards girls.

True, there are other observations. So, W. Ikes and R. Burns ( W. Ickes, R. Barnes, 1978) noticed that boys and girls with traditional gender roles look at each other less often, talk to each other less often, smile less and use fewer gestures when communicating compared to those students whose gender roles are more liberal. It is possible that these features of the communication of people of different sexes with each other are due to the shyness associated with age characteristics.

Women are more likely to look at the interlocutor during listening than during speaking, while men do not have such differences. (J. Hall, 1996).

Women maintain eye contact more often than men in conversation, regardless of the gender of the person they are talking to.

Smile. Women tend to smile more often than men, but their smile is harder to interpret (Bartol, Martin, 1986; Carli, 1991;Johnson, 1993; Cross, Madson, 1997). True, much depends on the communication group and the position of the man in it. In all-male groups, men smile and laugh less frequently than women in all-female groups. However, in mixed groups, male leaders, communicating with female subordinates, and male subordinates, communicating with female leaders, smiled more often than females. (C. Johnson, 1993). Female leaders laughed equally often when interacting with both men and women (unlike male leaders who only laughed in the presence of the opposite sex) (C. Johnson, 1993).

Men's smiles usually signify positive feelings, while women's smiles often reflect appreciation and friendliness (Hall, 1996).

Gesticulation. Gestures during communication are used by men and women in different variations and with different frequency. Men are more likely to use touch on others than women, the latter prefer touching themselves.

Women are more likely than men to press their hands to their body, lean their whole body forward less, touch their hair more often, straighten their clothes and tap their palms. Consider the specifics of the use of a number of gestures by women.

Gesture of trust - "Dome"- the fingers are connected like the dome of the temple. During this gesture, the hands can be at different heights. Women usually put their fingers together on their knees in a sitting position or just above the waist in a standing position.

Gesture "hands applied to the chest" since the time of ancient Rome, it has been regarded as openness and honesty. Women rarely use this gesture.

Protective stroking of the neck with the palm of your hand. In many cases, when a person takes a defensive position, the hand moves back, as if drawing back for a blow or pulling back as if from a burn, but this is masked by the fact that after this the person puts his hand on the neck. Women usually fix their hair at the same time.

For a woman, a typical gesture of insecurity is slowly and gracefully raising the hand to the neck; if a necklace is worn, then the hand touches it, as if checking whether it is in place.

Touch. Women, as a rule, themselves touch others much less often than men, but they value touch more. Women view touch as an expressive behavior that expresses warmth and affection. Men view touch as an instrumental behavior: for example, touching a woman is considered a prelude to sex. (Pearson, West, Turner, 1995). In opposite-sex couples up to 30 years, men more often resort to tactile contact, and at a later age - women. Men prefer to touch the hands, while women prefer the hand itself (Hall, veccia, 1990).

Pose. The masculine demeanor is characterized by sitting with legs wide apart (P. gallaher, 1992). When talking, women tend to tilt their bodies forward less than men.

Distance between communication partners. Men communicate with each other at a greater distance, it is less customary for them to hug and especially kiss. This is due, as some authors believe, to the fear that they will be suspected of homosexuality. True, these rules are not observed in all countries. In Morocco, as S. Bern (2001) writes, men can freely walk the streets holding hands or even under the elbow.

The distance between communicating in men and women may depend on their height. In the experiments of M. Argyle with a group of Oxford psychologists, a clear connection was revealed between the “conversation distance” and the growth of the interlocutors, and this connection turned out to be different for men and women. The taller the man, the closer he comes to the interlocutor, and vice versa, the smaller the height of the man, the further he prefers to be from his interlocutor. In women, the opposite relationship was observed. The authors of the experiment explain this by the fact that a kind of “cultural norm” has developed in our society - a man should be tall, and a woman, on the contrary, should be miniature. Therefore, people tend to unconsciously conform to these norms. A tall man is pleased to stand next to his interlocutor, and a tall woman, on the contrary, tends to move away to hide her flaw. It follows from this that it is not necessary to approach a tall woman or a short man during a conversation - it will be unpleasant for them. On the other hand, a miniature woman or a tall man can be approached very close - they will be pleased.

For many women, point-blank gaze is an expression of aggression. Most women turn away when they see someone (usually a man) staring at them. Women avoid point-blank staring, as they believe that such a look often expresses aggression or a non-verbal sexual message.

When conversing with another person, women usually keep a closer distance and give themselves less personal space than men. In addition, women are given less space at work, have smaller offices, or work together with other people. (Hall et al., 2000; jacobson, 1999). Based on this non-verbal message, we conclude that men dominate society and have a higher status than women; a person who controls more physical space has more power, is more dominant and has a higher status than a person who controls less space. Meta-analytic studies (Hall, 1984) show that these gender differences are quite large.

In terms of posture, women tend to adopt a less relaxed posture than men. The postures of women are often more restrained than those of men, who are allowed to behave more naturally and more frankly in public. Society encourages girls and women to sit like "ladies" (i.e. with legs together or crossed at the ankles and hands on knees). Women are less likely to sit with their ankle on the other knee or with their legs apart (Hall et al., 2000).

Also, women smile more often than men. (Hall et al., 2000) ... Men ... touch a woman more often, but this touch is not mutual. If a woman touches a man's shoulder or arm, he often interprets this as a sign of sexuality. And women may perceive such a gesture differently. Touch can be interpreted as a friendly gesture or as an abuse of power.

Paludy M., 2003, p. 228–229.

It should be noted that the interpretation of non-verbal behavior in men and women also differs, which creates difficulties in the relationship between them.

10.8. Male and female communication styles

The manner of communication between men and women was given great importance in ancient Greece. For example, a man was supposed to keep his head up high, otherwise he could be mistaken for a homosexual. Women, on the contrary, were not supposed to look the interlocutor directly in the eyes. The look averted to the side testified to modesty, modesty, humility. True, over the centuries, mores have changed. Now women do not look away. On the contrary, according to R. Exline, women look at interviewers more often than men.

As V. M. Pogolsha notes (V. N. Kunitsyna et al., 2001), male and female communication styles are mainly formed under the influence of historically established sex-role stereotypes, although the role of psychophysiological characteristics is not denied. Indeed, it is unlikely that girls' need to express their emotional experiences in communication with their peers is also only a consequence of their mother's imitation. Most girls are naturally more emotional, which means that they also have a stronger need to discharge emotional tension. Rather, behavioral characteristics should be considered as phenotypic, as a fusion of innate and acquired.

The male style of communication from early childhood looks more active and objective. Men are more direct about their needs, which makes them more understandable and predictable than women. The masculine style emphasizes independence, a penchant for actions characteristic of people in authority, and the feminine style emphasizes interdependence. Women are more socially oriented, they are more aware of the fragile ties that unite people and make their communication more trusting. Male communication style is more manipulative. The female style of communication reflects the partnership system of interaction, and the male style reflects the system of dominance. For a man, the content of joint activities is more important than individual sympathy for partners.

Male communication is characterized by greater emotional restraint, the desire for creative and rational ways of interaction (L. Carli et al. 1995). Women express their emotions and feelings more freely, including with persons of the opposite sex.

Women have a wide range of interpersonal distances, each of which shows a certain level of intimacy with a person. The female style of communication is associated with such interpersonal relationships, which are characterized by subordinate or socially desirable behavior strategies, demonstrating which a woman relies more on intuition.

There are traditional differences in the topics of conversation between men and women. Women are more willing than men to conduct "confessional" conversations, especially with close people, they talk more about themselves, their affairs and problems. For women, the problem of relationships with other people is very important, so they prefer to discuss it. D. Tannen (2000) explains the emerging misunderstanding between men and women by different perceptions of the situation of communication. Women are tuned in to empathy and expect it from men, while men are focused on a practical solution to the problem and, instead of empathy, offer advice to their interlocutors, that is, rational options for getting out of the current situation. Men, on the other hand, expect advice and solutions from women, but receive sympathy and empathy. If women speak the language of relationships and intimacy and understand this language, then men speak the language of status and independence and understand only it.

10.9. Features of communication via the Internet

O. V. Levshina (2002) revealed the peculiarities of communication between men and women via the Internet. Finding and obtaining the necessary information, as well as satisfying business interests, is a motive more often for men than for women, while most of the latter use the Internet to communicate.

Women are more emotional and often experience joy, pride, delight when mastering the ability to find the right information. For them, communication in chats is more often an opportunity to throw out accumulated negative emotions than for men, since indirect communication helps to overcome embarrassment, shyness, and free expression of emotions, including aggression.

• 44.

One of the main features of early adolescence is the change of significant persons and the restructuring of relationships with adults. Adolescence is considered the age of unfolding the problem of fathers and children. We and They (adults) are one of the leading themes of youthful reflection, the basis for the formation of a special youthful subculture. On the one hand, the need for liberation from the control and guardianship of parents remains relevant - the processes of isolation, the desire to emancipate, isolate oneself from the influence of the family, and free oneself from dependence are relevant. This is no longer teenage negativism, but often loyal, but firm removal of relatives who seek to maintain their former direct relationship with their growing son or daughter. The inability or unwillingness of parents to accept the autonomy of their children often leads to conflicts. It is good for everyone if, at the end of their struggle, a young man or girl returns spiritually renewed with love and trust in their loved ones.

On the other hand, in youth there is a strong tendency to identify with adults. Virtually no social or psychological aspect behavior of young men that would not be related to family conditions. Among the topics on the basis of which communication and the very community with adults, primarily with parents, could be built are: the choice of a future profession, educational affairs, relationships with others, moral issues, hobbies, questions about yourself and your past, present, future - everything that is connected with life self-determination. But communication with adults, according to the boys and girls themselves, is possible only if it is dialogic and trustworthy. Young men and women strive to be equal with adults and would like to see them as friends and advisers, not mentors. Since there is an intensive development

"adult" roles and forms of social life, they often need adults, so at this time you can see how often young men and women seek advice and friendship from older people.

At the same time, parents can remain an example, a model of behavior for a long time. According to polls by T.N. Malkovskaya, it was found that approximately 70% of boys and girls would like to be like their parents.

In general, at the stage of personalization (according to the periodization of V.I. Slobodchikov), in youth, a real partner in community, with whom everyone is identified personally and in his own way, becomes a social adult, embodied in a system of social roles and partially personified in such cultural positions. as Teacher, Master, Mentor, and further - Consultant, Expert. An adult is valuable and significant, first of all, by his real (and not ideal - like that of a teenager) adulthood, which reveals itself in a meaningful way, reveals itself through rules, concepts, principles, ways of organizing activities in all spheres of socio-cultural life - in craft, science, art, religion, morality, law. It is through familiarization with the active forms of adulthood that a person first realizes himself as a potential author of his own biography, takes personal responsibility for his future, clarifies the boundaries of his self-identity (self-identification, self-acceptance) within being together with others.

Communication with peers is very important for boys and girls. Outside the society of peers, where relationships are fundamentally built on an equal footing and status must be earned and able to be maintained, boys and girls cannot develop the communicative qualities necessary for independent adult life. At this age, the first friendships and love attachments of a fairly long, although predominantly romantic nature, appear. Consciousness of group belonging, solidarity, comradely mutual assistance not only makes it easier for the teenager and youth to isolate himself from adults, but also gives him an extremely important sense of emotional well-being and stability. At the same time, it is precisely in adolescence that the need for isolation increases, the desire to protect one’s unique world from the intrusion of third-party and close people in order to strengthen the sense of personality through reflection in order to preserve one’s individuality, to realize one’s claims to recognition. Separation as a means of keeping a distance when interacting with others allows a young person to "save his face" at the emotional and rational level of communication. In youth, loneliness is valued - the more independent a boy or girl and the more acute the need for self-determination, the stronger his need to be alone.

Communication with peers solves a number of specific tasks: 1) it is a very important channel of specific information (which cannot be obtained from adults); 2) it is a specific type of activity and interpersonal relationships (assimilation of statuses and roles, development of communication skills and communication styles); 3) it is a specific type of emotional contact (awareness of group belonging, autonomy, emotional well-being and stability).